Dick doesn't click and turn into a brick

Hi guys,

So sex is decent to good with the wifey. The majority of the time I'm able to get hard at will and all is good. No problems.

Ive only started punting this year and the nerves, anxiety, guilt are starting to slowly settle.

On occasion I get some decent eye candy servicing me and some flow with the ML during the session. However, my dick doesn't click and turn into a brick! And it wrecks the experience (esp if I'm offered part 3 and want to smash it). Resulting in most some cases a soft cum.

I think it's a psychological thing. I have connection with the wifey. I'm comfortable in a vulnerable state. Perhaps I need to see the ML regularly to fit into that sweet spot.

I just wanted to share this and get it off my chest. Also, incase others are currently in my boat with their partner, gf or wifey.

Cheers

Maybe you're not ready to see an ML? Just stick with the wifey?

Foreplay. And lots of it

I think your mind is used to be turned on by intimacy to be ready to play based on your sex experience with gf/wifey.

However sex can also be stimulated by erotic visual, sound and touch that does not require emotional attachment. I think this the state of mind of most punter who play with “no string attached”.

I think if you can think this way, you can enjoy sex better with ml/wl, as you are now thinking sex is just physical release and not trying to bond emotionally

It's a guilt no doubt.

Find a good church and understanding priest and confess your sins.

Be honest and sincere about it.

And find a way to punish yourself e.g hitting your head on a brick wall, walking home without shoes and socks until the feet bleed, standing below cold shower every morning.

It's through pains that your repentance and your guilt are fullfilled and you come to full closure.

Angels will smile and blink at you again.

You are over thinking, just relax and keep trying

My advice stop punting and focus on the wife, talk to her about spicing things up by watching some bondage and go buy some adult toys to use in the bedroom,
you got to think of the consequences if something goes wrong like she gets an STD from you or she finds outs and ask for a divorce or even worse she passes away and you have to live with the guilt,
take this opportunity to re think your actions and the long term price you will have to pay just to get some whore to suck your dick

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Originally Posted by Rookiestones

Hi guys,

So sex is decent to good with the wifey. The majority of the time I'm able to get hard at will and all is good. No problems.

Ive only started punting this year and the nerves, anxiety, guilt are starting to slowly settle.

On occasion I get some decent eye candy servicing me and some flow with the ML during the session. However, my dick doesn't click and turn into a brick! And it wrecks the experience (esp if I'm offered part 3 and want to smash it). Resulting in most some cases a soft cum.

I think it's a psychological thing. I have connection with the wifey. I'm comfortable in a vulnerable state. Perhaps I need to see the ML regularly to fit into that sweet spot.

I just wanted to share this and get it off my chest. Also, incase others are currently in my boat with their partner, gf or wifey.

Cheers

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Don't stress...your not the only one. The same thing happened to me when I first started punting. No problems with the wife but sometimes couldn't get hard with ML, even with the help of a blue pill. Started punting late 2019, only MLs. From the beginning of this year mainly been seeing WLs with no problems. Although it still plays on my mind...and yes it is a psychological thing... you will eventually overcome it if you keep punting away.

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Originally Posted by sydpunt

I think your mind is used to be turned on by intimacy to be ready to play based on your sex experience with gf/wifey.

However sex can also be stimulated by erotic visual, sound and touch that does not require emotional attachment. I think this the state of mind of most punter who play with “no string attached”.

I think if you can think this way, you can enjoy sex better with ml/wl, as you are now thinking sex is just physical release and not trying to bond emotionally

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I think you hit the nail on the head. What you say is true, well atleast it is for me. At first I thought I had the same issues as the OP because of guilt, but in time understood this was not the problem. Now I think in the same way you have pointed out and no longer have that problem and am really enjoying punting....maybe enjoying it too much now.

If you’re good with wifey, why you have to punt?

Like other posters, I too also wonder why you are taking the risk punting when your sexual relationship with your wife is okay.

I get the thrill of sleeping with lots of different women etc but maybe you should just call it quits while you are ahead.

First of all its risky. As others have said, it would be almost impossible to explain away an STI. A positive result can be weeks after contact, many STIs can show no symptoms, and usually it is two treatments plus abstinence or condoms before you can safely have sex again. If you feel a little guilty now just imaging what that process would feel like.

Believe me, divorce sucks, especially with kids. In this country it is almost impossible to live on one income unless you have a large income, inheritance or lots of real estate. If that is the case then the likelihood is years of court battles tussling over custody and financial splits. In addition, the court will rule in the favour of your wife financially as they take into account "wastage" via gambling and other vices (I presume prostitutes also). Your friendships will suffer as they all find out that your wife left you because you were cheating with hookers behind her back. The kids might disown you.

And then there is all the money and time wasted punting. Use that to spice up your sex life, shower your wife with lingerie and the new techniques you have learnt through punting. The trick is supreme honesty. If you are a randy, kinky soul with a vivid fantasy life don't hide it, be honest about it with your wife. Maybe she might decide to leave you then but at least you found out she cannot handle the real you.

Swinging might be on the cards for you and your wife. Propose it. You never know if you don't propose it. I think swinging is better for a long term relationship than the open relationship concept. With swinging you are more involved in what each other are doing. It can even simply be same room sex for starters. However if she doesn't want a bar of it then don't go it alone. Maybe just talk about your fantasies with her. Hopefully she loves you enough to entertain your ideas.

I find that the relaxed state with a long term partner really assists in getting erect. My current partner is a friend for many decades that I recently got together with. We know each other so well. It doesn't hurt that she has big and beautiful tits, but whenever she gets dressed or undressed, or we talk of sex, I get a rock hard erection.

I tell her about all my fantasies and she puts up with my ideas, preferring that they were all just kept fantasies. However I reckon I will pull them out as things get stale

Oh, and I have ADHD so I am a thrill seeker, get bored easily etc. I love the dopamine rush of punting but not at the expense of a good relationship. You can get thrills with an LT partner if you have some imagination.

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Originally Posted by Jamit

Like other posters, I too also wonder why you are taking the risk punting when your sexual relationship with your wife is okay.

I get the thrill of sleeping with lots of different women etc but maybe you should just call it quits while you are ahead.

First of all its risky. As others have said, it would be almost impossible to explain away an STI. A positive result can be weeks after contact, many STIs can show no symptoms, and usually it is two treatments plus abstinence or condoms before you can safely have sex again. If you feel a little guilty now just imaging what that process would feel like.

Believe me, divorce sucks, especially with kids. In this country it is almost impossible to live on one income unless you have a large income, inheritance or lots of real estate. If that is the case then the likelihood is years of court battles tussling over custody and financial splits. In addition, the court will rule in the favour of your wife financially as they take into account "wastage" via gambling and other vices (I presume prostitutes also). Your friendships will suffer as they all find out that your wife left you because you were cheating with hookers behind her back. The kids might disown you.

And then there is all the money and time wasted punting. Use that to spice up your sex life, shower your wife with lingerie and the new techniques you have learnt through punting. The trick is supreme honesty. If you are a randy, kinky soul with a vivid fantasy life don't hide it, be honest about it with your wife. Maybe she might decide to leave you then but at least you found out she cannot handle the real you.

Swinging might be on the cards for you and your wife. Propose it. You never know if you don't propose it. I think swinging is better for a long term relationship than the open relationship concept. With swinging you are more involved in what each other are doing. It can even simply be same room sex for starters. However if she doesn't want a bar of it then don't go it alone. Maybe just talk about your fantasies with her. Hopefully she loves you enough to entertain your ideas.

I find that the relaxed state with a long term partner really assists in getting erect. My current partner is a friend for many decades that I recently got together with. We know each other so well. It doesn't hurt that she has big and beautiful tits, but whenever she gets dressed or undressed, or we talk of sex, I get a rock hard erection.

I tell her about all my fantasies and she puts up with my ideas, preferring that they were all just kept fantasies. However I reckon I will pull them out as things get stale

Oh, and I have ADHD so I am a thrill seeker, get bored easily etc. I love the dopamine rush of punting but not at the expense of a good relationship. You can get thrills with an LT partner if you have some imagination.

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Great sound advice

punting and marriage don’t mix well.

"take this opportunity to re think your actions and the long term price you will have to pay just to get some whore to suck your dick"
I don't know....I really love paying whores to suck my dick. Have had some use fantastic techniques over the past couple years

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Originally Posted by CharlieM

"take this opportunity to re think your actions and the long term price you will have to pay just to get some whore to suck your dick"
I don't know....I really love paying whores to suck my dick. Have had some use fantastic techniques over the past couple years

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You can tell by your response you are not married, and really don't understand the consequences of your actions if you are,

If life with wifey is okay, then my strong advice is to go ML only and stick to NHJ with young hotties. If you must, go CBJ or condom FS. Though rare, the risk of a STI that you also give to your wife is catastrophic in terms of $$. Is an hour of bliss worth a million dollars and kids who hate you? I suggest not...

That said, a blowjob done with hot tea and CIM with swallow is one of gods greatest ever inventions. And rimming. And cowboy while she masturbates herself to completion. God i love this hobby.

Thank you everyone who's provided comments and advice thus far. Everyone has a valid point. I appreciate it, sincerely. Ive got alot to think about but yes the impacts and consequences of picking up STI/STD is the most concerning. I can cover all tracks but that shit is invisible.

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Originally Posted by OLD SNAKE

You can tell by your response you are not married, and really don't understand the consequences of your actions if you are,

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OLD SNAKE....So what your saying is that all the punters who are married are not really married as they don't understand the consequences of their actions if they really are. I think you've been playing with the old snake a little too much lately and need a reality check. I don't need to explain how my marriage works, nor do I need to explain my sexual needs to you or anyone else. Are you married or have you ever been married?