Can't Cum

Hello Brothers. This is partially a vent and partially a call for help. As the title states, I've recently started trying to see ML and WL but I haven't had a "successful" time

Me:
So to firstly to give some context on myself. I'm a young healthy guy mid-late 20s but most people say I look younger (early 20s) likely because I'm relatively short and my skin is pretty good probably due to not being out in the sun very much. People often say I look Korean including Koreans and other Asians but I'm something else. I was born and grew up in Australia however so I can only pretty much speak English. Not overweight, light athletic build, don't currently do much sports though but never had issues with weight or fitness. Was somewhat popular with girls in high school but I think once it became clear I was always going to be shorter than the other guys I think interest dropped off a bit but that's my own feeling; I'm 172cm (5'6'') but most of my mates are >180cm (>6ft). I'd give myself a 7/10 but that's my own not particularly informed hetro opinion. Also definitely an introverted and reserved person. Anyway, I'm not here to sell myself just give a bit more context.

Failing Dating:
I've never had a girlfriend. I think I've definitely had some opportunities with mutually interested girls but didn't go through with them at the time and now those girls are long gone. If you'd ask me my reasons were extremely overbearing mother, a desire to put studies and career first, and if I'm being honest I was scared of getting into a relationship and making myself emotionally vulnerable. Not that I didn't want a girlfriend but maybe I kept making excuses for myself.

After high school I went to a study and a career path with near zero females. I'm talking >95% sausage fest in my experience. So pretty much no "organic" interaction, certainly not much choice and very much a "competitive" market. I did sports which was an alright way so get "organic" interactions but more recently due to a pretty intense working life (>50hrs/wk) I find I'm lacking the energy or the time to commit to sports. I'm the type to completely throw myself at things and get competitive, only being able to play sports casually is a bit depressing so I'm just not playing at all now. Also for work, I've moved to a different city (Sydney) where I know pretty much no one and don't have any real social circle. I have one good friend from high school but he's tied up with a missus so not much socialising there unless I just wanna third wheel all day.

Being that I can't get much exposure to girls "naturally", I've tried turning to dating apps as a way to meet girls and try get dates. As you might expect, I haven't had any success despite trying on and off for >6 months and (on-off for years before). I do get matches but it usually ends up no response, getting ghosted or to be honest I ghost them or otherwise can't really carry on the conversation. I am yet to have any in-person meeting as a result of dating app matches. So far I've tried Tinder, Bumble, Coffee meets Bagel and Boo (probably the most useless one for trying to meet people physically). I have noticed that pretty much 100% of my matches are (east) Asian girls of some sort.

Masturbating (too much?)
So I don't think I have "impotence" issues. Likely to be honest, if anything I might have problems with masturbating too much. I'd consider myself a healthy young guy so I get itches despite never having a girl friend, perhaps more so than average? Since I started in my pre-teens I've wanked nearly everyday (circumstances permitting) often multiple times a day and sometime multiple times in a row (but with a few days break after). I've never had issues reaching success or maintaining an erection even for >1hr (recent record is >3hr) with my hand and some video material or even just my own imagination. So my lack of performance (or enjoyment) when seeing WLs or MLs was been surprising to me. I thought I've have trouble keeping it in the full time not have trouble keeping it up.

In the interest of being open and honest in the hope of getting open and honest advice, I'll confess. Most of what I wank to is Hentai (Japanese Pornographic Cartoons). Not that I don't find real women appealing at all but I just have a much easier time finding good quality material that at least I enjoy in the form of Hentai rather than AVs. I note I generally find JAVs more simulating then "mainstream" content despite the censorship. I also use onaholes (fleshlights) more recently. This could potentially be contributing to my issues I guess?

Have been on SSRIs before, that made it hard to wank but been off for years and again, not trouble when it comes to just wanking.

Getting "Professional" Help:
So getting to the present day: no GF, still virgin, and not wanting to waste my remaining "youth". No success trying to get with a girl let alone land a date. I can't remember what triggered it but I realised Sydney is one of the few places where professional help is not only legal but apparently of relatively good quality. I also for the first some had a decent amount of spare cash (and no GF or other hobbies to spend it on) so I decided to pull the trigger. I spent the past month lurking on these forums, learning, researching and trying to find a good place for my first time. Maybe a bit idealistic or misguided but I thought I could have a better experience and a cleaner experience if it was an Asians only girl (why not? feels more exclusive too but none of them have been Asian only AFAIK so far) and if it was private apartment rather than a bordello on the street e.g. Ginza.

So I contacted two agencies and booked a girl on the weekend and went to the apartment. I stumbled through the process a bit and did the thing but I found the experience surprisingly... not pleasurable. Ended up running out of time and leaving without finishing. Needless to say, a pretty disappointing experience.

I tried again, this time with a well regarded RnT. Girl was recommended by mamasan for top quality massage. Again, the whole ordeal was fairly un pleasurable and not particularly erotic feeling, despite receiving some special treatment from the girl that isn't normally offered. I remember another user here mentioning they always had to finish themselves by hand and another reply it was likely "death grip syndrome" from wanking too much too hard so I think that's the mostly likely issue right now.

Both times I felt like it was a bit lacking physical stimulation and both times when I asked them to do it harder they were surprised to was too much and would hurt me.

I might make some detailed posts later on both experiences as well as any subsequent experiences but not as reviews naming people since I feel it might be bad press due a problem that is maybe more my own fault than the girl's.

Remedy Plan
So "death grip syndrome" seems to fit what I'm experiencing. Could also a variety of other issues though: stress, nervousness, anxiety or depression. I plan to try abstaining for at least 2 weeks then give it another go and post my results.

If you actually read all that then thanks for listening to my sook story. Would welcome any similar experiences, advice, recommendations or pity. Cheers.

TL;DR
Can't seem to enjoy the services of a WL or ML. Probably wank too much too hard. Advice and recommendations appreciated.

I think you've pretty much answered your own question. Abstain for 2 or 3 weeks before your next encounter. I'm also guessing part of your issue is anxiety. You are probably nervous as hell so thinking about too many other things during the punt.

Maybe try finding a little bit older, more experienced WL/ML and actually explain the situation to her. You'd be surprised the things they have experienced over the years. Could also try a longer session so you can get more relaxed and a longer build up.

Good luck with whatever you try.

My dear miiata, aka fi1teredglue, aka alexchinn,

Now that you assume a further persona, shouldn't you choose a new username? Did you forget? And enjoy Sydney.

Bloody hell mate calm down! You sound like you’re completely over thinking it all. Smoke a joint or something before you go and relax a bit.

Book a flight to Bangkok

Nice copy paste from the Sydney forums.

It should be noted that Miiata (with 2 i's) is a troll!

Here is the original post. http://www.aus99forum.com/showthread...r+path+females

This miiata (double ii) should be banned again form the forum.

Up your testosterone. Lift some weights, stop wanking, eat nutritious food and get plent of sleep.

Not sure if serious meme