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Thread: From really bad to really good

  1. #1
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    From really bad to really good

    Worst for the day - Exquisite Massage - Underwood:
    Since Exquisite Massage was raided I've generally avoided the place as the new management have clamped down on extras to have no more nuding up, BJs etc.. strictly HJ extra as that is all the police will look the other way on. Buuut I decided to give them a whirl as I happened to be in the area driving past toward Kingston and noticed not many vehicles out front so figured I'd have my pick.

    I got to see Summer who has previously offered FS ($200) but is now doing HJ only as per boss advice. Anyway, I paid $100 and she came back with my $40 change and put it on top of my clothes which was fine. Tip was $40, again fine. I went to get it off my stubbies and nothing was there. Thought she had been cheeky and maybe put it in my wallet, nope, also my other $100 note missing from wallet. I asked her where my change and money is, she said it was on my stubbies. I said WHERE? and pulled all the clothes off the little table and upturned the little basket thing they have.

    She said "oh, maybe you lost it? you pay now?" at which point my blood was boiling so I started shouting at her and raised a hand (wasn't gonna do anything) at which point I hear footsteps all over the place. Boss lady comes in to calm me down, assures me it was an error on my part. Well then all of a sudden Summer pulls the money out ($100) and gives it to me, I demand the $40. I get my $40 as well. I should have got a refund on the massage but I was so steamed I just left.

    AVOID AVOID AVOID.

    Bad but not awful - Suzy (Mt Gravatt, near Dominos)

    Normally I stick to shops but left it a bit late today so I looked her up on Locanto and sent the message, got the reply with address where to go. Rocked up, knocked at door and greeted by Suzy. Paid $100 for massage w/hand relief for 1 hour. Both her and the house smelled very strongly of cigarettes, she had a lot of tattoos including on her arms and back which I don't like on a lady and she had a big c-section scar on her belly.

    Led into the room, massage was crap from the get-go as she only has a bed with a very soft mattress so there is NO pressure. On top of that she continued to take calls ON SPEAKERPHONE from other punters and reply to text messages the whole time even though I asked her multiple times to stop. The whole time a ridiculously loud Michael Jackson karaoke-version CD was playing in the room.

    Handjob was not bad but how can you really get that wrong, she kept asking me "mm, you cum now?" about 20 times. Each time she did that I was close but her questions kept making me lose focus. She finished me off and I went to have a shower. Made the mistake of not checking the towel situation, had the shower and realized the only towel was drenched from the previous punter(s). Called for her, no reply, looked around for another towel, nothing.

    So I just walked back to the room and dried myself on the sheets. Still couldn't find her, I was calling out for her but she had disappeared. Got dressed and got the heck out of there with a neighbour staring me down as I walked to my car. Wouldn't recommend this one unfortunately.

    Melbas Body & Health Steam Massage, Slacks Creek

    Feeling a bit down with the punting scene after the last two, I decided to take a punt on a place I've never been before but which has been around for a while I believe.

    Made a booking for a spa treatment with Flxxxn, $150 including a coffee scrub, jacuzzi bath etc. The place is a bit dated, the room was bizarrely decorated with what looks like a large persian rug cut into panels and glued to the floor, ceiling and walls (the entire room is one giant persian rug cave).

    What the place lacked in modern fitout, it made up for in enthusiasm. I won't go into the details, but two pineapples will give you an AMAZING time in a very clean (I checked) jacuzzi with F.

    Enjoy, boys, don't spoil this one.
    Last edited by HHHeisenberg; 08-04-2021 at 11:04 AM. Reason: Headings

  2. #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by HHHeisenberg View Post
    Worst for the day - Exquisite Massage - Underwood:
    Melbas Body & Health Steam Massage, Slacks Creek
    Feeling a bit down with the punting scene after the last two, I decided to take a punt on a place I've never been before but which has been around for a while I believe.
    Made a booking for a spa treatment with Flxxxn, $150 including a coffee scrub, jacuzzi bath etc. The place is a bit dated, the room was bizarrely decorated with what looks like a large persian rug cut into panels and glued to the floor, ceiling and walls (the entire room is one giant persian rug cave).
    What the place lacked in modern fitout, it made up for in enthusiasm. I won't go into the details, but two pineapples will give you an AMAZING time in a very clean (I checked) jacuzzi with F.
    Enjoy, boys, don't spoil this one.
    So all up you paid $250?

  3. #3
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 4FoW2 View Post
    So all up you paid $250?
    Yes, that would be correct. Worth every penny.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HHHeisenberg View Post
    Worst for the day - Exquisite Massage - Underwood:

    She said "oh, maybe you lost it? you pay now?" at which point my blood was boiling so I started shouting at her and raised a hand (wasn't gonna do anything)
    The infested steaming shit bag returns....

    Joins yesterday and within 2 posts has “taken advantage” of a girl and now “raised a hand” at another. Wow.... what a welcome to the forum.

    And great work on outing yourself on this forum with such a descriptive “incident” at a named shop.

    An asshole and stupid. A common combo.


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    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maddona View Post
    The infested steaming shit bag returns....

    Joins yesterday and within 2 posts has “taken advantage” of a girl and now “raised a hand” at another. Wow.... what a welcome to the forum.

    And great work on outing yourself on this forum with such a descriptive “incident” at a named shop.

    An asshole and stupid. A common combo.


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    You see the Exquisite issue (literally stealing from me) as being something I deserve or shouldn't complain about?

    Are you a mamasan or ML yourself?

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    Quote Originally Posted by leon_001 View Post
    I don't have to believe you, you fukking whiner.

    At the end of the day, if you don't like it just quit. If you are being stolen from or whatever, there is help available to you.

    All we can do is take advantage of you. I have no sympathy for you. I look after myself and that's it.

    I have no idea why losers like you feel the need to whinge incessantly about a bad massage. You used to have regular MLs who'd watch you cry, your pathetic and would cry on her shoulder, she would listen sympathetically to your shit for a little while, wipe away your pathetic tears ... then ask you to pay up and fuk off.
    Where have I heard that before?

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by leon_001 View Post
    I don't have to believe you, you fukking whiner.

    At the end of the day, if you don't like it just quit. If you are being stolen from or whatever, there is help available to you.

    All we can do is take advantage of you. I have no sympathy for you. I look after myself and that's it.

    I have no idea why losers like you feel the need to whinge incessantly about a bad massage. You used to have regular MLs who'd watch you cry, your pathetic and would cry on her shoulder, she would listen sympathetically to your shit for a little while, wipe away your pathetic tears ... then ask you to pay up and fuk off.
    Hahaha. Pure gold.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HHHeisenberg View Post
    You see the Exquisite issue (literally stealing from me) as being something I deserve or shouldn't complain about?

    Are you a mamasan or ML yourself?
    A bad massage is stealing by not providing the service for monies. Actually stealing is worse lol

    I’m sure the ML didn’t understand English so words wouldn’t have helped. Improvise.


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    Next time look at her face when talking to her and slow down
    English is not the first language
    You can always use sign language
    Pick up her hand, smile and show her what you want
    This language works all over the world
    She will smile back
    It’s funny though they can all count money from any country

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    Quote Originally Posted by spaceman View Post
    Next time look at her face when talking to her and slow down
    English is not the first language
    You can always use sign language
    Pick up her hand, smile and show her what you want
    This language works all over the world
    She will smile back
    It’s funny though they can all count money from any country
    The ML Whisper has spoken (but forgot to say “Ask about ABN status lol).


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    Quote Originally Posted by leon_001 View Post
    whisperer.....................
    No. When they finishing you. You whisper “I’m coming but how’s your ABN status?”


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    I seem to recall this fuckwit saying the same bullshit story about raising his hand to an ML when he was here last time.

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    Quote Originally Posted by RottenLittlePunt View Post
    I seem to recall this fuckwit saying the same bullshit story about raising his hand to an ML when he was here last time.
    It’s my go to move as well when I want to impress a bunch of blokes, I’ll talk about how I slapped a woman.

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    She doesn’t need a ABN as the shop probably doesn’t have one

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    It doesn’t exist and she never worked there
    I know you probably drove there ,walk In the front door , had a massage
    But it not really there
    Just put it down as a good dream

  16. #16
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RottenLittlePunt View Post
    I seem to recall this fuckwit saying the same bullshit story about raising his hand to an ML when he was here last time.
    Hey RLP, you're mistaken but how have you been? I've missed you.

  17. #17
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spaceman View Post
    It doesn’t exist and she never worked there
    I know you probably drove there ,walk In the front door , had a massage
    But it not really there
    Just put it down as a good dream
    You're not making sense, have you been on the glass BBQ this morning, spaceman? Riding the glass harley?

  18. #18
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by leon_001 View Post
    how fukken weird that both dealornodeal and fuknutuncertainty both use the term glass bbq.

    not weird at all.

    Fukken moron.
    It is common vernacular in Australia to refer to an ice pipe as a glass BBQ/glass harley.

  19. #19
    Senior Member(無間使者) HHHeisenberg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by leon_001 View Post
    So common. You search ‘glass bbq’ in this forum and only two fuk wits from qld have used the term. They both share similar passions for the same woman.

    Fukken moron.
    You only joined toward the end of my last visits here, little buddy. You may or may not remember, I've had a decent 'holiday' since then, and I'm not somebody to be trifled with. I'd suggest you google the name Tama David Lewis.

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    Quote Originally Posted by HHHeisenberg View Post
    You only joined toward the end of my last visits here, little buddy. You may or may not remember, I've had a decent 'holiday' since then, and I'm not somebody to be trifled with. I'd suggest you google the name Tama David Lewis.
    Hahahahahahahaha

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