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Thread: Safe word with WL/MLs

  1. #1
    Senior Member(無間使者) StiFFFy's Avatar
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    Safe word with WL/MLs

    G'day Punters,
    Anyone ever tried using a safe word while you punt? Howd you go about agreeing to it?
    For some context, spent 15 min of first ever punt explaining the concept to a WL with poor English due to being a greedy StiFFF (mainly biting/too rough) and don't want to waste time and money again doing it, but at the same time don't want to be accused of rape.
    Cheers

  2. #2
    99 Premium Member (特級會員) rooter's Avatar
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    The best safe word is Stiffy. But nor stylised with 3 CAP Fs, that's too weird.

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    Quote Originally Posted by StiFFFy View Post
    G'day Punters,
    Anyone ever tried using a safe word while you punt? Howd you go about agreeing to it?
    For some context, spent 15 min of first ever punt explaining the concept to a WL with poor English due to being a greedy StiFFF (mainly biting/too rough) and don't want to waste time and money again doing it, but at the same time don't want to be accused of rape.
    Cheers
    Safe words are usually associated with BDSM....Master and Submissive...in case things get out of hand

  4. #4
    Baby Member(留言版初哥)
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    Best safe word is ‘harder’

  5. #5
    Super Fans (忠實Fans)
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    Safe word can be anything. Just gotta be in their language

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    Quote Originally Posted by StiFFFy View Post
    G'day Punters,
    Anyone ever tried using a safe word while you punt? Howd you go about agreeing to it?
    For some context, spent 15 min of first ever punt explaining the concept to a WL with poor English due to being a greedy StiFFF (mainly biting/too rough) and don't want to waste time and money again doing it, but at the same time don't want to be accused of rape.
    Cheers
    There is a simple LEGAL word in use, ALL will understand.

    "NO"

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by local View Post
    There is a simple LEGAL word in use, ALL will understand.

    "NO"
    Well said..........

  8. #8
    Senior Member(無間使者)
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    I'm not into BDSM (never tried). But in that world no can mean yes.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by kingqxxx View Post
    I'm not into BDSM (never tried). But in that world no can mean yes.
    If you never tried, how would you know.?
    No means no

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by local View Post
    There is a simple LEGAL word in use, ALL will understand.

    "NO"
    Simple internationally understood word. Good simple advice.

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    Quote Originally Posted by kingqxxx View Post
    I'm not into BDSM (never tried). But in that world no can mean yes.
    Wrong.

    NO always means NO. by arguing that point, you should be ashamed of yourself.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by floppydick View Post
    Wrong.

    NO always means NO. by arguing that point, you should be ashamed of yourself.
    In BDSM no is quite often used and most dominatrix will keep going, that is why a safe word is used. However all this is consensual and discussed prior.

  13. #13
    99 Premium Member (特級會員) rooter's Avatar
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    Vanilla sex and BDSM are two different worlds.
    In the normal/vanilla world which includes dating, casual sex, relationships, marriage, punting etc then its very simple No means No and you don't need a safe word.
    But the BDSM world is different. Saying "No", "Stop", etc can be part of the game/play, so you need a safe word like "Red" "Mercy" etc to know you really want to stop.
    Just to repeat the obvious, in punting no really does mean no, stop really does mean stop. Don't be an arsehole and don't be a rapist. You will do 10 years in prison.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by floppydick View Post
    Wrong.

    NO always means NO. by arguing that point, you should be ashamed of yourself.
    I am not saying this is how things should have or could have. I am just calling the world as it is. Where in my last statement did I disagree 'no means no'? Read it again and tell me mate. And where exactly in my statement did I 'argue'? Do not put words in my mouth floppydick.

    You can denounce the practice of using safe word in the context of BSDM because <fill in your reason> and I will respect your view. I may even agree with you. But there was nothing wrong with my last statement. It is factually correct.

  15. #15
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    How about just using the word STOP?

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    Quote Originally Posted by B0nkers View Post
    How about just using the word STOP?
    The word STOP is actually not that commonly understood. Consider its synonyms such as HALT is possibly more used, but it sounds different.

    Think of NO in multiple languages and is much more practical. Also even asian language usage it would be much more known and used.

  17. #17
    Junior Member(有D料到)
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    Why would you need a safe word for normal sex

  18. #18
    99 King Member (帝皇會員) GoldfishMan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StiFFFy View Post
    G'day Punters,
    Anyone ever tried using a safe word while you punt? Howd you go about agreeing to it?
    For some context, spent 15 min of first ever punt explaining the concept to a WL with poor English due to being a greedy StiFFF (mainly biting/too rough) and don't want to waste time and money again doing it, but at the same time don't want to be accused of rape.
    Cheers
    Why would you want to do that with a girl who doesn't even fully comprehend English? You can't even communicate clearly to begin with. It'd be like a duck explaining how to paddle up a stream to a chicken.

    Recipe for disaster, I reckon.

  19. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by ch4nkei View Post
    Why would you need a safe word for normal sex
    What is normal sex?

  20. #20
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    Interesting thread but I think some of the lads are missing the point of Mr Stiffy’s post. He’s simply asking how do you bring up the subject or explain the concept to a woman.

    When it comes to sex play the spectrum is wide ranging from teasing and withholding, to soft, sensual, passionate sex, to hot, steamy, intense, rough sex to more aggressive forms of play in BDSM. Even in BDSM there are varying levels of intensity.

    A visual indicator as to whether the woman might engage in more intense and rougher sex is to look for bruising around ankles, wrists, arms, arse, breasts, neck, hickeys or love bites etc etc Some women do like dirty talk, being pinned down, dominated, grabbed, spanked, arse slapped, hair pulled, light choking, blind folded, soft biting etc as it increases the release of dopamine, serotonin, oxytocin, and endorphins - which can be quite addictive.

    As Mr Rooter correctly pointed out if there’s no consent to the act then legally it’s deemed a criminal offence ranging from sexual assault, aggravated sexual assault to rape etc. The caveat might be actus reus and mens rea. Either way always ask for consent even if it was provided previously.

    A great topic for discussion gents.

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