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Punters dirty limericks..
Let’s fucken go!
There once was a whore named Sue,
Who filled her pussy with glue.
When they paid to get in,
She said with a grin,
You must pay to get out of it too!
——-
There once was a girl named Jojo
who was reportedly quite the ho
she was not very tall
and when standing by a wall
was just the right height for a blow.
——-
There once was a callgirl name Sumi
Whose pussy was not very roomy
But because of this
She was a popular Miss
And never once drove clients loony!
——-
There was a hooker from Honchu
Who on peckers and penises did chew.
Said a friend, “Why don’t you
Have them stick it to you,
Then you could enjoy the sex too.”
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Deep in the bowels of a city called Lokum…
An old punter rolled joins to smoke em.
But what he really preferred,
was to tear ass and fuck turd,
with the young girls whose hymen he broken.
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This one’s well known but anyway…
There once was a man from Nantucket,
whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said, with a grin, as he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear were a cunt I could fuck it."
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Good one's Ghost thanks.
I have several, here's one:
There was a young man from Golosham
who took out his balls to wash em
his mother said "Jack
if you don't put them back
I will tread on the buggers and squash em"
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Aye aye aye aye..,
Cocksuckers never eat hair pie.
So sing us another one
Just like the other one
Waltz me around again willie.
There one was a hooker called Daisy
Who was always so fucken lazy
Till a cowboy from Cairns
Rubbed her sexual glands
And her arse start pumping like crazy.
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There was a young girl from Mullaka
Who played with her boyfriends left knakka
One night they were tight
She played with his right
And the bugga went off like a cracker
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An old whore from Bangkok named Dot
Who lived off cum jizz and snot
When she ran out of these
She ate the green cheese
That she grew on the sides of her twat.
A young whore who came from Lahore
Would lie on a rug on the floor.
In a manner uncanny
She'd wiggle her fanny
And drain your balls dry to the core.
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this should be made into a pocket edition for punters in waiting room
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There was a young man from Leeds
who swallowed a packet of seeds
a big bundle of grass
grew out of his arse
and covered his balls with weeds
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There was an old Jew from Belgrave
who kept a dead whore in a cave
he said "I admit
I'm a bit of a shit
but think of the money I save!"
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