Another stupid falling for a girl story - advice?

[HamishAM]

I'm back with another stupid "falling" for a girl story - but this time not with a ML/WL.

I recently ventured into the sugar baby realm and I met this Japanese girl - shes 20, beautiful (literally a 10/10 in my books) and is really interesting. Shes into the clubbing scene and raves but a big weed user.

I have been seeing her for the past 2-3 months and it's been great - besides me catching feels...again. The way she looks at me, the way we kissed, it was like I was making love to her instead of fucking - it felt real? It felt too good.

We talked about our feelings, well mine. She seemed to avoid it a bit and ultimately said she is crap at relationships and wasn't after anything serious (I'm kinda the same). To be honest, I just wanted to spend more time with her and get to know her more. She mentioned she likes me but wants to just keep in the room. She mentioned i'm the only guy paying for her (not sure If I believe that) but she has a few sexual partners. We have been doing it unprotected (another attribution to my feelings) but found out shes been doing it with 3-4 other guys too which kinda drove my head into overdrive.

I find myself watching her Instagram stories constantly and whenever she live streams on TikTok.

Essentially now my feelings are just wrecking my brain and im not sure what to do. I want to keep seeing her because the sex is amazing but the emotional damage is real. Thoughts?

[Roshtosh]

Are you looking for answers that you want to receive? Everyone will tell you to cut it off. Mixing these kinds of emotions with these girls will only send you down a rabbit hole of endless pain.

[gundamsux]

Mate sad to burst the bubble. But if you pay, then it’s nothing more than a business transaction. This is sadly from personal experience, so you can count on my advice.
Enjoy the fun but don’t get too attached. Ask her if she would fuck you if you don’t pay. If she say no then you get your answer.
My advice is to go to a brothel and empty your nuts a couple of times in a row. You will think clearer when you’re not horny.

[Double_Adapter]

So are are you concerned more about catching the feels or the fact that's she's been raw dawg'd by 4 other blokes?

I'd be asking the following - is she on the pill and has she had a recent STI/STDs check up

[JSteel96]

Probably some people won't like my answer but here goes. These girls are experts at making you fall in love with them and feel like your the only one they are playing a game with your heart, head and emotions. The hard truth is they are likely doing the same thing with at least a dozen regulars in private. They are totally in it for the money. They will avoid getting in a serious relationship with you because they are possibly already in a serious relationship. I've said this to someone else before who wanted to marry his regular. You don't know everything about her you don't know if she already has a partner. These WLs are there for our sexual needs. Whilst you have deep feelings for her I suggest you back off from getting too attached as you will only get heart broken and your mind is already fucked up. If she gets pregnant she may say your the other parent. Then your totally screwed with paying her support money. On the same hand if that was to happen demand a dna test when child is born. Because it could just as easily be one of the other clients who is the real parent. Unprotected sex is very risky esp if you cum in her. I make sure not to come in my lady. Make sure you get yourself checked for sexual infections you have been sharing the same lady with other punters.

I think you should seriously back away from her and go see several other WLs instead. Your head is already spinning because shes playing the game with you and your falling for her when you shouldn't be. Your in to deep. Golden rule for punters is do not fall in love with your regular WL.

[HamishAM]

Mate sad to burst the bubble. But if you pay, then it’s nothing more than a business transaction. This is sadly from personal experience, so you can count on my advice.
Enjoy the fun but don’t get too attached. Ask her if she would fuck you if you don’t pay. If she say no then you get your answer.
My advice is to go to a brothel and empty your nuts a couple of times in a row. You will think clearer when you’re not horny.

Yeah i asked her if I didn't pay would she continue. She didn't really give an answer but pretty much felt like it was no.
I want to enjoy the fun but i'm finding myself thinking of her alot.

So are are you concerned more about catching the feels or the fact that's she's been raw dawg'd by 4 other blokes?

I'd be asking the following - is she on the pill and has she had a recent STI/STDs check up

I'm concerned about the feels. Im not stupid but I cant help it. I feel like the raw dogging is an issue for health and its surprising for me really. Its probably more then 4 too lmao.
Not sure about the pill. I feel like she should with that many guys no? Re STI/STDs yeah i'm concerned about that and i talked to her about it. Shes like "I know i should be using condoms" but that was it.

Probably some people won't like my answer but here goes. These girls are experts at making you fall in love with them and feel like your the only one they are playing a game with your heart, head and emotions. The hard truth is they are likely doing the same thing with at least a dozen regulars in private. They are totally in it for the money. They will avoid getting in a serious relationship with you because they are possibly already in a serious relationship. I've said this to someone else before who wanted to marry his regular. You don't know everything about her you don't know if she already has a partner. These WLs are there for our sexual needs. Whilst you have deep feelings for her I suggest you back off from getting too attached as you will only get heart broken and your mind is already fucked up. If she gets pregnant she may say your the other parent. Then your totally screwed with paying her support money. On the same hand if that was to happen demand a dna test when child is born. Because it could just as easily be one of the other clients who is the real parent. Unprotected sex is very risky esp if you cum in her. I make sure not to come in my lady. Make sure you get yourself checked for sexual infections you have been sharing the same lady with other punters.

I think you should seriously back away from her and go see several other WLs instead. Your head is already spinning because shes playing the game with you and your falling for her when you shouldn't be. Your in to deep. Golden rule for punters is do not fall in love with your regular WL.

Yeah, she definitely made me feel for her. The way she looks into my eyes and we kiss. She doesnt close her eyes, constantly gazing at me and smiling when we are banging and she seems interested in my looks. I know I should leave but the sex is amazing and as a punter you know how hard its to find someone that clicks with you and is amazing. Thats what is holding me back, I dont want to lose that.

[HamishAM]

Are you looking for answers that you want to receive? Everyone will tell you to cut it off. Mixing these kinds of emotions with these girls will only send you down a rabbit hole of endless pain.

Just need a reality check really. Can you cut it off when you are having some of the most amazing sex of your life?

[gundamsux]

It’s a tough situation you’re in brother. I understand that feeling of being charmed and sucked into romance.
One thing that I found helpful was to build a list of things you want to do with this girl in bedroom, kinda like a wish list. Tick each box as you go. And when you finish your list you would have achieved all you want from this girl and cut all contact.

[Meng]

Wait so is she saying you're the only one paying her but she's raw dogging 4 other blokes for free?

Dunno man. Think you might be getting ripped off.

[rooter]

You are paying for sex. No matter how you dress it up or sugar coat it you are paying for sex.
The girl seems like she understands the nature of the relationship perfectly. And it's pretty obvious she has the same arrangement with all the other guys too.
It's you has has lost the plot bro.
If you can't just have the sex without all the feelings and heartache and stress, then there is only one solution. End it.
It will be painful short term, but you will get over it. You will feel relief and you will find another girl soon enough.

[begov94]

Last night was one hell of a crazy fire vortex brought back to life. I'm not sure if it qualifies as banter or not because it seems that many people suddenly went off character.

Anyways, there are many resources for dating guides for sex workers on the web, you really need to find help if you're stuck in a predicament where you're falling in love with a girl you've had access to sex easily.

Everyone to their own lives. Some are happy to date a sex worker, some are disgusted and think they're addicted to the sex. It can also happen with non-SWs; the girl becomes a free booty call, you have the best sex with her but you don't want to commit with her emotionally, and this causes you to be torn between lying to her to have continuous great sex or looking for another booty call.

To me, falling in love is great regardless of the girl's day (night) job. 'M' in my view is worth all my effort in making her my wife. Then again, with all these crazy postings about cutting off an SW yadayadayada, I can only participate in the conversation using words of example because I don't think any attempts at persuading people to understand my point of view is working at all.

Please read this guide below and reconsider how you view your emotional attachment to the SW.

https://sexworkerhelpfuls.com/f/how-...e-a-sex-worker

For those slandering my spiritualism, understand this: it is through Buddhistic training of non-biased views that I learned not to judge a person based on their work but to base it on their selflessness. If you're selfless you won't call yourself a victim of your childhood circumstances up until this adult age. 'M' has that selfless attitude of not calling herself a victim of anything, and that's why my feelings for her will never change regardless of whatever dumpster fire threads started in regards to disrespecting an SWs need to have a normal life.

[HamishAM]

You are paying for sex. No matter how you dress it up or sugar coat it you are paying for sex.
The girl seems like she understands the nature of the relationship perfectly. And it's pretty obvious she has the same arrangement with all the other guys too.
It's you has has lost the plot bro.
If you can't just have the sex without all the feelings and heartache and stress, then there is only one solution. End it.
It will be painful short term, but you will get over it. You will feel relief and you will find another girl soon enough.

You think she has those arrangements with others too? That's what I'm unsure of. Yeah ending it seems like the way. I want to push the feelings down but it's not that easy.

Wait so is she saying you're the only one paying her but she's raw dogging 4 other blokes for free?

Dunno man. Think you might be getting ripped off.

Legit lol. But probably no other way to get with her without paying.

It’s a tough situation you’re in brother. I understand that feeling of being charmed and sucked into romance.
One thing that I found helpful was to build a list of things you want to do with this girl in bedroom, kinda like a wish list. Tick each box as you go. And when you finish your list you would have achieved all you want from this girl and cut all contact.

Yeah that's a good idea. Might think about this one more.

[Abracadabra]

You are paying for sex. No matter how you dress it up or sugar coat it you are paying for sex.
The girl seems like she understands the nature of the relationship perfectly. And it's pretty obvious she has the same arrangement with all the other guys too.
It's you has has lost the plot bro.
If you can't just have the sex without all the feelings and heartache and stress, then there is only one solution. End it.
It will be painful short term, but you will get over it. You will feel relief and you will find another girl soon enough.

Good clear logical sensible pain avoidance advice Rooter..
Pay Fuck Leave ...

99% of the time you follow it and then once in a while that 1%er comes along to challenge you ..

Ever fallen off the Pay Fuck Leave wagon Rooter?

[Footballpunter]

sorry dude, if you are the only one paying for her, out of like 4 people, doesn't that just mean she likes you the least??

[HamishAM]

sorry dude, if you are the only one paying for her, out of like 4 people, doesn't that just mean she likes you the least??

Well we met initially cause of the arrangement. Otherwise we wouldn't of met. Is it not possible to get feels while I'm paying. She's obviously on tinder and in the club scene meeting people. This is some massive copium on my end though. But just the way she engages me and the look she gives. It's hard

[begov94]

When dating a sex worker, it's you against the world. I'm ready, in fact I've been through that a while now. I know M might be afraid that through all these dumpster fire talks about how shameful it is to date a sex worker that if we were to get married etc., that I would one day regret the decision and leave her for a younger non-SW. Sorry, that kind of thinking is for people who had lived an easy life, in fact for those kind of people they'd have their marriages arranged for by their parents.

If anyone here is a real punter, I pity your trains of thought. There's many Reddit posts out there where people are willing to date sex workers, but with the condition that she is mentally stable and knows how to differentiate her personal sex life and work sex.

In conclusion I think this thread is nonsense. If you think sex workers are shallow, that's probably because you yourselves are shallow.

[JSteel96]

One last advice start wearing a condom. Bro I break my own advice with mine but better to be safe than sorry when you catch something. Cause shes seeing a dozen other guys how many of them are not wearing doms. If its not on its not on.

[c1teh9]

You say that she looks at you a certain way when you are together, but if she felt these real emotions for you then she wouldn't still be charging you for sex, and not saying she only wants to keep in the bedroom. It's obvious from an outsiders perspective that you're falling for her but it's not the same for her. It sounds like she is young as is just having fun with life ATM and she's not keen on anything serious.

My advice would be to have one final long session with her, get it out of your system and then cut all ties if you can't handle your emotions.

Either way, look at it in the right light and just be grateful for the great experiences you had with this woman and then move on and see what else is out there in the world.

[keebab]

There is a lot of sage advice here mate. She's keeping you at arms length, which is exactly what she should do as long as its a business relationship. What started as fun is now painful and won't be good for your headspace in the long term.

Cliche but there are hundreds of hot 20y/o Jap girls walking around Sydney. You can always find another.

[HamishAM]

You say that she looks at you a certain way when you are together, but if she felt these real emotions for you then she wouldn't still be charging you for sex, and not saying she only wants to keep in the bedroom. It's obvious from an outsiders perspective that you're falling for her but it's not the same for her. It sounds like she is young as is just having fun with life ATM and she's not keen on anything serious.

My advice would be to have one final long session with her, get it out of your system and then cut all ties if you can't handle your emotions.

Either way, look at it in the right light and just be grateful for the great experiences you had with this woman and then move on and see what else is out there in the world.

Yeah you're right 100%. My thinking is if it could get out of the feels then its really worth seeing her at what im paying. But the feels I think just fuck me too much. She is definitely young and just doing whatever she wants to.

There is a lot of sage advice here mate. She's keeping you at arms length, which is exactly what she should do as long as its a business relationship. What started as fun is now painful and won't be good for your headspace in the long term.

Cliche but there are hundreds of hot 20y/o Jap girls walking around Sydney. You can always find another.

Thanks man. Yeah it was super fun but I got too close + too into her.

One last advice start wearing a condom. Bro I break my own advice with mine but better to be safe than sorry when you catch something. Cause shes seeing a dozen other guys how many of them are not wearing doms. If its not on its not on.

Yeah, easier said then done lol.