I see it this way.

If there is ONE thing, which Women are prized for above all else, it's their sexual value.

Most men in the world could not give a flying strap-on how much money a girl makes or what she does. That's obviously why even a high status man can be totally satisfied with a hot McDonald's worker. We just don't care, and probably it's preferable that way anyway, as it allows the man to be in the natural role of dominance.

If you are with a woman who earns a lot more than you and or is in a much higher status position than you, I think those relationships fail much more often than not.

So if we don't care what they make or do, what's left is the woman's beauty and sexual commodity.

This might be one rare occasion we DO care what they do, as it's actually affecting their sexual commodity.

I'm all for being a gentleman to the woman whilst I am with her (as an ML) and I'd even go so far as to say I'd love one to day to take an ML out just for fun, shits and giggles, grab a movie, bowl, timezone that kinda thing. But as a romantic partner no.

Because unfortunately her sexual commodity is ruined. Her beauty remains obviously, but knowing what we as men would value most on the woman, is being given away to anyone with coin (especially knowing how she might be treated or the kind of calibre of man she might end up under) Its just a no.

If you can and are willing to overlook this somehow, by all means tread that path, but know that the odds are against you, and chances are it won't work.

As far the question of whether you should let her know you know, the answer is no.

It's convoluted and 'female logic-y' but I think what would run through her head is "he knows, and won't protect me or take me away from getting fucked by any guy that wants me for money, how could I see him as a protector or provider for me and or any kids we have?" I know it's a huge leap in logic, but it's about the same kind of logic that had some feminist believe that women are as strong as men, and her Mum, in a fit of rage and 'mama bear power' could fuck up Brock Lesnar. (From whatever.com).

Simply amazing logic there.

Hope this all helps.