Lily Medina and Sea Monkeys

[Steven Seagal]

Person's Name : Lily Medina
Establishment : North Strathfield
Date of Visit : December, 2015
Contact Details/Address/Weblink : 0458472166 http://sydney.backpage.com/FemaleEsc...rience/8365434
Hours of Business : Whenever?
Rates : $200/60
Age : I’d say 30 something.
Size/shape : 5' nothing, size 8, C cups, shaved pussy
Nationality or Ethnicity : Irish
Services Provided : FS, BBBJ, cim, dfk.

Howdy All,

This is a review of Lily Medina.

Folks I am always the eternal optimistic and seek things feeling I will hit pay dirt and have a good time. Most of my ‘adventures’ are like clown cigars that blowup in my face.

When I was younger I was reading ad in the back of Ring Magazine for fantastic offers.

I sent $5 away for a device that would hold papers together without stapling them and six weeks later, when it arrived, it turned out to be a small paper clip.

Then I sent away $40 for a ‘love doll’. The ad purported to show pictures of the love dolls and they looked like real life hotties. The ad even said, “Put her in the car, drive around and impress your friends!” When ‘Kiki’ arrived she turned out to be an inflatable doll, looked nothing like the picture, but a lot like Betty Boop. She had a grotesque mouth from which I guess she’d give a bbj and a similar hole for her vagina, with painted on pubic hair.

Drive around and impress my friends? Yeah, impress them enough so they called for a rubber ambulance and guys carrying big nets to take me on a one way trip to the funny farm.

Then there were the $20 X-ray specs. These were glasses that would let you see through walls and look through women’s clothing. “I’ve got to have those”, I thought. When they arrived, imagine my disappointment when I saw they were made out of cardboard.

“In for a penny . . .In for a pound”, I thought. I put on those ‘glasses’ and instead of looking through a wall promptly walked straight into one. I broke the specs and almost broke my nose in the process.

I would tell you about the $30 ‘sea monkeys’ I sent away for, but you get the point.

After the sea monkey thing I had the following interaction with my mate Jimmy-Joe Meeker.

Jimmy-Joe: They see you coming Steven when they write those ads.
Steven: What about you and that $50 gas engined, model plane?
Jimmy-Joe: What do you mean about that?
Steven: All you got for your dough was a PICTURE of a gas engined, model plane.
Jimmy-Joe: Yeah Steven, I guess we are both Gulliver.
Steven: You mean gullible and you’re right.

This brings us to Lily Median.

Ah yes, I had visions of the Sea Captain Lily leading me on a voyage of sexual discovery and adventure.

Lily moves around a lot but when I saw her she was in North Strathfield.

First impression was I though she looked a bit like a gnome. I can’t explain it but she had a look like she might have been marinated in chicken fat.

Folks, this girl can talk and talk and talk. She likes to talk about her favourite subject . . .Lily Medina. She has won all these sex awards and is seeking a career as a porn star.

She refers to herself as a Sex Captain but I would instead rate her more a Sex Private First Class.

Don’t get me wrong, she was nice enough, but a bit overhyped. Dfk, covered sex in different positions, bbj with cim.

It was ok, but just

I guess at $200 an hour that’s good value when you think some Cauc WL’s are trying to get $600 on Cracker.

I wonder what happened t my Sea Monkeys?

Well, I am hopelessly behind in my reviews.

Got to go now mates.

See you soon.

Until that time friends . . .until that time.

Steven.

[samuraiboy]

bro steven

it would appear to the untrained eye that 'pound for pound' you may have perchance achieved great return on investment from the $40 spent on 'Kiki'...?

[blackcurrant]

I would avoid lily medina. I know for a fact she used to/has done/still does bareback/unprotected sex for extra. Avoid at all costs. She is also incredibly unattractive.

[babelx]

Steven you have a way with words! Great review. I can count with one finger the times I've had a good time via a cracker/backpage ad.