Originally Posted by
Donn
Greetings Bros.
This is my attempt at condensing my accumulated knowledge of Sydney massage shops (mainly Chinese run shops) into a basic guide. The scene in Sydney includes many different types of shops and no one person can know everything. I have my obvious preferences and to a certain extent all of what I say should be taken as my personal view rather than as objective truth. Nevertheless, I do think that most of what I write below stands up to scrutiny.
I. BEFORE VISITING THE SHOP
Golden rule #1: Accurate information about MLs is scarce, very scarce.
It is easy to forget this. However much you want to believe that massage girl X is young and has large natural boobs, she doesn't. She's older than you think, has smaller boobs, darker skin, a chubbier figure and so on. On the other hand, that is not necessarily a bad thing. The unexpected pleasures given by certain girls which go against your type are often the most gratifying rnt moments.
One more general remark. Most of the women working in small suburban massage shops, especially if they have been there a long time are women in their thirties or older. There are very, very few hidden gems. I have only ever found one or two and they did not keep working at those small shops long. Remeber this when you’re driving out West somewhere to some obscure massage shop because the receptionist or whoever you spoke to managed to convince you that they’ve got a big boobed young student desperate to please you.
WEB
Most efficient mode of communication and the shops which master it can become very successful. Can include photographs and written descriptions. Let me explain each of these more carefully and then I'll outline the types of official communication policy that a shop can adopt.
Written descriptions
Name: Important because it allows you identify the girl when you make a booking. This rarely includes disinformation, but beware of poor spelling and names which sound similar (annie, angie; wendy, windy, winnie etc.)
Nationality: Usually accurate, but there can be distortions. Chinese girls pretending to Japanese, more common in the past than it is now.
Age: Almost always inaccurate. Most (if you include the vast number of anonymous, unadvertised suburban shops) MLs are over 30, but very rarely does their advertised age exceed 28, 29. Even the most trustworthy shops will lie about this, especially when it comes to the over 30s.
Rules of thumb:
Girls advertised at 28 or 29 are almost always in their 30s.
Girls in their mid twenties are in their late twenties.
Girls in their early twenties (depending on shop communication policy) may well be in their early twenties.
Girls who are 18 or 19 (depending on shop communication policy) are usually in their early twenties.
For most shops you must develop your instincts, take into accound the shop's basic communication policy and remember the golden rule.
At the end of it all, you can usually just fit girls into two categories: on the young side, on the old side.
This is actually not such a major issue for me personally, although an actually 20 year old masseuse can be very gratifying.
Body: There are three or four basic descriptors here. Build, Boobs, Skin Tone, Height.
i. Build. Shops hint about this, although some do provide accurate weight/height data so you can work it out. If a shop even mentions the words ‘curvy, cuddly, etc. it means the girl is fat. Remember the golden rule.
ii. Boobs. A personal sore point of mine. Always, always, always, exaggerated. D cups are extremely rare, let alone E or F. Almost all girls will have As or Bs, some will have small Cs, a small group full Cs, and a handful, D or above. Apart from size, all boob conoisseurs will want to know if they are natural/fake. I don’t use the term ‘enhanced’, it is a pernicious misnomer. If the boobs are advertised as C or above, and not described at ‘natural’, then they are fake. Even if they are described as natural, they might be fake, but are most likely simply smaller than the shop claims.
iii. Skin Tone. Almost always darker than advertised. ‘sun kissed’ or ‘tanned’ are commonly used euphemisms. Most girls have an inbetween skin tone. ‘milky silky pale skin’ is used to describe many girls but is rarely accurate. Even the most reliable shops will lie a little about this.
iv. Height. Usually accurate enough, but often not mentioned. The word ‘tall’ is meaningless, but ‘petite’ usually does mean smaller than usual.
Service: Mostly subjective, not worth reading. All girls are ‘friendly’ ‘willing to please’ etc. Ignore this. Some shops use code like ‘open minded’ to hint at non-standard extras, but more on that later. Some also hint at the quality of erotic services in other ways. Always vague and never reliable.
Massage: Mostly subjective, very rarely is massage ability a deciding factor so it is not usually lied about.
Photographs
Over the last five years the number of shops offering photographs of their girls has increased steadily.
Remember the gold rule, it also applies to photographs.
The photographs published are the best ones of said girl, the ones which the owner thinks will best entice future customers.
Some rules of thumb:
i. Skin tone is always much paler in photographs. If you see a hint of darker tones assume the girl is much darker.
ii. Judging boob size from photos is an art. Girls use push-up bras, their hands and forward leaning poses to emphasise cleavage. They also pad out bras under t-shits, dresess etc. For you big boob lovers out there, never forget the gold rule here.
Look at the cleavage line itself, if it is short but the boobs look big, then push up bras are in play.
A simple photo in a bra photo is the most reliable.
Remember, if a girl really does have massive naturals, she will usually show them to you in the photograph in a way that confirms their size.
Pay attention to the eveness of outline if the girl is wearing a dress of t-shirt. Padding usually creates uneven contours.
Experience, and hours studying boobs (boob fetishism anyone!), will equip you well here.
iii. Low quality, selfie, dark, photographs can sometimes contain more truth than glossy, well-lit shots.
iv. Eyes, if not blurred, often give insight into age.
Basic Web Communication Policies of Shops:
a. Heroic
Some shops make an extraordinary effort to communicate accurate information about their MLs.
For example, 227, Five Dock 81-85, Artarmon 84A, Central Massage 423, Blossom. There may be others. Reward these shops and imagine how fantastic the massage scene would be if all shops were like this.
b. Slippery Truth.
Some shops include enough truth that the discerning punter can glean what they need to know and limit risk.
For example, Summerville, DOS shops in the city, Wynyard, QVB, CBD 121, Tokio Studio [watch out Japanese cup sizes], Sydney Baby Darlinghurst, North Strathfield 227, Bexley Massage, Babmoo 651. There may be others.
c. Less is more.
Some shops don't release much information. Names of the girls, nationalities, an unreliable photo.
Drumoyne, Golden Rose, Artarmon 126, Renwick, and many many others, including most suburban shops
d. Disinformation blends.
Some shops release a mixture of accurate and extremely inaccurate information (outdated, untrustworthy photographs etc.). The percentage of truth varies.
Dragonfly, Apple, the Pitt street strip in general, some others.
e. Liars
Some shops release a bewildering amount of disinformation which often borders on outright lie and falsehood. This is really a subet of e. The percentage of truth approaches zero.
Many shops dabble in this policy for a while and then see the error of their ways, some have adopted it as their official policy. The only shop that comes to mind here is Dream Girls 130, but there may be others.
Reviews:
This is a controversial topic. I won’t name any reviewers but simply give some personal opinions about this. Take them however you want, they are just my informed opinion reading reviews over the years.
1. Most reviews are long, boring attempts at erotic narrative writing and bad jokes, although I’d say this is even more the case with full service reviews.
2. Service quality is always subjective. Imagine the difference in your own service quality when fucking a 20 year old model and a 60 year old bag with a bad attitude.
3. Descriptions are mostly subjective. Some reviewers reliably communicate important information regarding the attributes which are most important to them: big boobs, massage quality, height, age etc. Negative reviews are more likely to be accurate about basic description, but cannot be trusted when it come comes to service etc. including customer service, see 2. above. Excercise caution.
4. Some reviews are obviously vanity projects or paid endeavours. A little bit of trial and error will quickly bring you up to speed here.
On the whole, reviews are useful when crossreferenced with other data. Use your instincts.
TELEPHONE:
This used to be more important in the past when info online was scant and adverisements in local newspapers almost always fit into category e. above: liars.
Just as shops have web communication policies they also have phone communication policies.
A few general remarks first.
A. There are two basic types of massage shop call.
1. Call to a shop you have visited before.
2. Call to a new shop or one you rarely visit.
1. Most shops save your phone number in their customer database (even if you didn’t give them permission to do that) and so when you call they will recognise the number and know they are dealing with some one who has visited the shop before.
Other things being equal they will tend to be less dishonest and more forthcoming if they know you have visited the shop before. However, this again varies in accordance with shop comms policy.
2. If you are not recognised, then the shop will be wary, will divulge less information and will almost always end up with the dreaded “come and have a look”.
B. Basic Shop Phone Policies:
As above under web policies except there is dominant category similar to c. ‘Less is More’ which I would call “come and have a look”. Most shops give you minimum information and resort to “come and have a look”. This is reasonable from their perpsective but not useful for customers. The logic is simple: once a punter is in the door they very rarely leave (braving the entrance for nothing, dick itch needs to be scratched, laziness, and classic punter attitude ‘fuck it, I’ll see that girl even though she’s absolutely nothing like advertised’
The shops also fit into these categories as above but on the whole they are much less forthcoming, especially the ‘slippery truth’ shops, and almost all gravitate to ‘come and have a look’ or ‘what time are you coming’.
d. and e. shops will lie shamelessly on the phone to get you in the door, many c. and b. shops will exaggerate to the point of falsehood too. If you are known customer c. and b. shops can actually transform into a. shops and give accurate information.
C. Phone tactics:
1. Research call:
Extracting information over the phone is an art but there are some rough rules of thumb.
i. If you can’t speak Mandarin remember the language barrier and speak simply, clearly.
ii. Open with “which girls are working today” then follow up with a question about the type of girl you’re looking for
“Do any of the girls have big boobs”
“Any new girls on today”
Laugh and be polite, don’t interrogate them or get angry if they bullshit you.
Sometimes they are busy and don’t have time to talk. Sometimes they don’t have receptionists and one of the massage girls answers.
Just talk as though every thing they say is perfectly reasonable and honest. Be sincere, even earnest.
Using the big boob question as an example, these are some likely responses followed by appropriate tactics:
i. “yes, today big boob girls” Always start by pretending you believe it and adopting a curious tone say ‘Oh, really, OK, what’s her name, is she available now” This reassures the receptionist that you are a serious customer and not another annoying guy calling.
Then, almost if its an after thought ask if they are natural or fake. Most Chinese speakers won’t quite understand what you mean here and might think that ‘natural’ means DFK or BBBJ. Be aware of this. You can usually get a read, case-by-case, on what to believe here. Also ask about size “a little bit big” or “very very big”.
If they hesitate in any way at this point, the boobs are small, not big.
If they claim not to know if the boobs are natural, they are definitely fake.
Apply this to all other types of question. ‘I don’t know’ usually means ‘no, but I don’t want to say no, so I’ll just say I don’t know’.
Other things being equal (unless its one of the e. shops) if the receptionist enthusiastically claims to have a natural big boobed girl, then there may be an element of truth to it.
If they recommend you come on another day to see girl X who has big boobs, they are more likely to be telling the truth. BUT, they might still be lying, and remember the golden rule.
If you’re feeling lucky, make the booking. After that, in a offhand manner, say something direct like “you’re not lying to me are you?” and gauge reaction. They now know that you will be coming to the shop and if they are lying they will start to worry about the lie, if they are lying. This does not apply to shops with d., e. comm policies. They will enthusiastically double down on the lie.
2. Booking Call:
Not too difficult but the beginner may still slip up. Remember the langauge factor if you don’t speak Mandarin or Thai and ensure that you say the time clearly. Sometimes you have to give a name, sometimes not.
II. AT THE SHOP
Before I start this I’ve decided not to write anything about telling the difference between ‘legit’ massage shops and ‘rnt’ massage shops. It’s pretty easy. In all my years going to massage shops I’ve never mixed up the two. Neon signs, sexily dressed girls, the standard prices, no windows, all give it away etc. etc.
ARRIVAL
A. In the car:
Some people of the more paranoid kind leave wallet, phone etc. in the car and bring only the money they plan to spend. This might make sense in dodgy late night brothels in the Western suburbs, especially if you are visiting for the first time, but on the whole this seems unnecessary in popular, established massage shops.
If you’re hiding your massage-going from a significant other remember to remove all trace of parking tickets from the car, don’t pay for them with a credit card.
B. Entry:
Most shops have a backdoor. Some require you to call them when you arrive so they can open it. If you’re worried about exposed entry, hats, and other little disguises might help. Book during quiter times. If you’re really worried or have a lot to lose, then you might have to make more of an effort to disguise yourself or restrict yourself to certain shops. Of course, the risk is also exciting, it’s punting after all.
Golden Rule #2: Before you have handed over the money (and sometimes even after, so long as you haven’t entered the room with the girl and closed the door), you can always choose to leave and not see anyone.
C. Choices
There are two basic types of shop visit summed up nicely by the common question “do you have a booking”.
1. Visiting a massage shop without a booking.
Risky, very risky, but sometimes fun and rewarding. Oftentimes frustrating. Lineups are much rarer in the massage world than in the full service world.
Some basic things to consider.
i. Almost all small suburban massage shops, and many other massage shops work on the rotation system. The girls take turns greeting a walk-in customer and they will lead that customer to the room and say “how long do you want to stay” as though you don’t have a choice. You do. If you like what you see, obviously go for it. If not, ask if anyone else is available. If they say no, it’s just me, then say OK, well then I’ll come back another time. They will almost always either produce another girl or two, or encourage you to wait for some other girl. They will then ask what type of girl you are looking for. See if you can get an accurate read on what the other girl’s like. Use the off-hand ‘are you lying’ question to test their honesty and then decide whether you want to stay.
ii. Remember, from their perspective, the longer you wait the more likely you are to choose someone even if you’re not that impressed with the girl. This is true for the bigger shops too.
iii. Don’t let receptionist bully or bamboozle you into choosing a girl you don’t like. They will always try to make you stay and they will always use whatever tactic they think will convince you to stay. This is perfectly resonable, they are in the sales business. Just remember that you do not have to stay and that it is not rude to leave if you don’t like what you see. A polite exit strategy: ask which day the receptionist recommends you come to see X type of girl she will then be less disappointed that you are leaving and hopeful that you will come again. Leaving you can say “see you next time”.
iv. If you are a regular, reception will usually give you some guidance, although they will still want you to stay. Don’t forget this.
v. Enjoy the choice and remember that you can always choose to leave, however much your dick or your sense of good manners tries to convince you that you can’t.
2. Visiting a shop with a booking.
The easy way. Relaxing, pleasant, especially if you’re confident you’ve made the right choice. If you’ve seen the girl before you know what’s next and you can look forward to it. If you have some reliable intel, it’s exciting to see a new girl that you’re sure will be good.
Things to consider:
i. Announce that you have a booking when you walk in and also give time of booking. They will then escort you to the room or perhaps ask you to pay at the desk by confirming the length of the booking. More about that below.
ii. If you are a regular, you can sometimes ask to have a quick look at the other girls for ‘next time’. Good information can be gathered this way, although I would not do this if you are seeing a regular. They will be offended.
iii. If it is the first time you’ve seen the girl and you feel that you been deceived, don’t be afraid to walk out. They know they lied, don’t worry about offending them. If you are a regular, reception will be apologetic and try to convince you to see someone else; if you are not, they might pretend to be angry and try and scare you into staying or offer other choices etc. Ultimately, remember the golden rule.
iv. Bait and Switch. Sometimes even the best shops will swap girl X (whom you booked based on reviews or other info etc.) with girl Y. There are several reasons this might happend.
a. Girl X doesn’t exist and is merely fiction bait to lure you into the shop and hopefully convince you to see Girl Y.
b. Girl X is late, busy or double-booked.
Reason a. is obviously more deceitful than reason b.
How do you know?
Is the girl significantly different from the one described? Say “This isn’t X” Reception usually will not want to lie too much in front of the girl because the girl will become frightened (and rightly so) that they will have to deal with an angry customer.
If you like the girl anyway, obviously go for it, but remember for future visits and if you feel inclined (I rarely do), vent some anger on the receptionist afterwards.
3. Deciding Session Length (30mins/45mins/60mins/90mins):
1. Unless you are especially poor or short on time, don’t choose 30mins. Your extras tips are the same (see below) but you get less time enjoying those extras. It’s just poor value.
2. If you are seeing a girl for the first time and are not sure (or are short on time/money) 45 mins is an acceptable session length. The girl won’t be rushed and you can savour your extras.
3. The ideal session length though is 60 mins. Plenty of time for extras, to enjoy the erotic build up of the massage and if you’re a regular and get one well with the ML she’ll also be glad to spend an hour of her day with you instead of that rude prick that comes in for 30 mins and tries to get free extras or hasn’t washed ball sack in a few weeks.
4. 90 mins is on offer too, but it’s usually the equivalent of adding another half an hour, no discount. Not really worth it unless you’re there for a proper professional level massage (which is rare).
PAYMENT
Golden Rule #3: Unless you enjoy the risk and the uncertainty, don’t pay until you’ve seen the girl.
A. The standard fees are the following:
1. Massage fee: 30mins ($40-45), 45mins ($50-55), 50mins ($60-65)
2. Standard Extra: Remove Clothes (20), Hand Job (30)=50
[Note at some shops, especially those that have all inclusive prices, the price is 60; non-Asian MLs working in primarily Asian massage shops sometimes demand 60 for extras in a longer 45min or 60 min session; if you haven’t been to the shop before or if you have that green look about you, MLs might attempt to extract bigger fees. Paying in advance helps with this, see below.
Two basic systems:
1. Pay your ‘massage’ fee and your standard extra fee (nude HJ) in advance. E.g. 227 Broadway
2. Pay ‘massage’ fee in advance, pay standard extra fee in the room. E.g. Summerville
1. If you pay everything in advance you can now happily undress and prepare to enjoy the session.
2. If you’ve only paid the ‘massage’ fee you now have a decision to make.Do you pay the tips up front or do you wait until later, either when you’re asked about extras during the massage or most likely at the end of the session? If you pay up front, pay the ML directly in the room. Never give this fee to reception. Some lay out the 50 on the table, others give it directly to the ML, makes no difference. If you think that there is going to be some differences of opinion about the nature of the ‘standard’ services offered, this is a good time to clarify the nature of these services.
So should you pay up front? Yes.
I think you should pay up front and because there is some disagreement about this let me explain my reasoning.
There is no doubt that the girl prefers to be paid up front. A small, but significant proportion of customers cause trouble when it comes to payment. They either reneg the price or pretend that they thought the tips were included in the massage price or claim that they thought it was ’15’ and not ’50’, etc. etc.
If the girl has been reassured that she will receive her tips she can relax and enjoy the session, she will provide better service. Some girls will also quite happily take off their clothes immediately and massage you naked or even skip the massage altogther.
(I prefer a little massage first so I rarely opt for this even if it is on offer. In fact, personally, I prefer the girl to remain clothed until the commencement of the extra services, this is because one of the basic drawcards of rnt is experiencing the sexual transformation of the ML. A professional masseuse chatting about day to day life eventually turns into an erotic naked siren oiling up your cock. But that is my personal view, others obviously see things their own way.)
Some argue that a girl provides lower quality service once she has been paid. This is simply not true. No one provides bad service on purpose, not unless they foolish and haven’t learnt how important regular customers are. Most of the time the girls will provide better service if you pay in advance, and when they don’t the service is not any worse than it would have been if you had withheld payment until your balls got tickled and you the girls whispers the extras question in your ear.
Finally, paying up front allows you to clarify the services offered (if necessary) with a clearer head and without delicate fingers caressing your dick and a sultry voice whispering in your ear.
B. Gratuities or non-service related tips.
No explanations needed here. You can tip extra if you want.
Remember that if you do establish this precedent and plan to see the ML regularly you might have to explain the withdrawal of the now expected tip.
In my experience, a $5-10 bonus separates you from many other customers, costs very little, and can improve your relationship with the ML. Of course, it’s entirely up to the punter to decide what to do here.
THE SESSION
The session is a time of almost infinite variation and possibility, an hour in which you and the ML can experience closeness, the release of erotic tension and indulge in all sorts of fantastic, tall tales about your ‘real’ life. Think of it as theatre where you can play the role you want to play. You don’t have to tell the truth about anything if you don’t want to. I’m just going to make some simple, quite general observations on how the most standard version of a session might unfold, which might help bros enjoy all the possiblities in a way that best suits them.
A. Standard Session
1. After being shown to the room the receptionist or ML instruct you to undress and will leave the room. You might also be offered a beverage or in some establishments you can shower either in the room or after walking awkwardly down the hall wrapped in towel.
2. I usually wait until the massage lady has returned before I undress fully. Others like lying naked on the table, face down, waiting in anticipation for the door to open and the ML to enter.
3.The massage will then begin. Styles vary, you are sometimes asked whether you prefer a hard or a soft massage, whether you want to oil to be used or not. If your massage activites are being hidden from your partner, avoid excess oil, especially if it is fragrant.
4. At a certain point, if you haven’t discussed tips in advance you will be prompted to decide whether you want to pay extra or not. If you say yes, or if you’ve already paid in advance, the ML will leave the room and bring back some hot towels, clean off the oil and after some wiping down or even the application of a little talc, the magic begins.
5. The ML will now strip down. Some keep their knickers on, which bothers some, clarify this before you pay if it bothers you. She will usually start an erotic soft massage culminating in ball play and perhaps some body-to-body, tit rubbing. Next you will be asked to turn over, you begin fondling tits, rubbing their body, boob kissing and some licking is generally acceptable. Penetrating fingers are generally not.
6. The rest of the session really depends on taste, inclination, etc.
7. Once you’ve been properly ‘relieved’ the ML will begin the cleaning routine. More hot towels can be requested. Tissues. If hiding massage activities from a partner, avoid fragant wet tissues. You will then chat lightly while you dress and hand over any tips owing.
B. Non standard extras:
This is another controversial and much discussed area. I’ll just make a few basic points here.
1. Non standard extras include, BBBJ, DFK, and eveything else on offer in full service joints.
2. Prices vary but add at least, at least 30-50.
3. They are not offered to all customers.
4. Some MLs will offer these extras after they’ve gotten you a little excited but before they’ve applied oil to your cock. Others wait until customers raise the question.
5. Places open after 8pm are more likely to offer this, but again, it is not standard and never will be.
6. Etiquette generally requires that you do not discuss the offering of such services in public because it might create problems for the shop and the ML involved. I agree with this basic principle.
7. Never demand, or even beg for these non standard services. Ask politely, once, if you must, but don’t be that guy.
AFTER THE SESSION
Now you exit the shop.
Some people like to chat with the receptionist or owner, inquire about new girls, build rapport.
Others, b-line for the door.
There are advantages to developing a relationship with owners/reception, especially when it comes to gathering reliable information about new girls.
iii. GENERAL MASSAGE SHOP ETIQUETTE AND FINAL REMARKS
Let me make this very obvious but often forgotten point.
Golden Rule #4: If you are a good customer, you will always, always receive better service in a massage shop.
Here are the most widely accepted rules of massage shop etiquette along with some general tips which will help you be the good customer.
1. Don’t be late. It causes the receptionist stress, disrupts the booking system and generally inconveniences everybody except for you.
2. If you are late, give shop as much notice as possible
3. Don’t flake on sessions.
4. Don’t haggle the price unless you are being ripped off. Even then, don’t haggle, just say that you’ve decided you do not want what is being offered anymore. (Another advantage of the pay in advance system).
5. Never shout, lose your temper, or abuse the girls in any way, ever. If you have a problem, speak discreetly with reception.
6. Respect the privacy of other punters and obey staff directions when it comes to sitting in waiting rooms or not exiting the shop.
7. Do not be dirty, unwashed, stinking, unwiped arse etc. etc.
8. Always allow the girls to decide what they do or do not want to do. Never pressure them. If you want a specific service, ask openly about it and if it is not on offer and you want it, see someone else.
9. Be patient, understanding, generally agreeable. Of course, if you don’t like the way a place is run or feel you’ve been treated unfairly, lied to etc. express your views clearly. Don’t put up with rudeness from shop owners or receptionists.
10. Basic day to day politeness.
This guide applies mainly to Chinese run massage shops, but Thai massage shops operate according to similar principles.
Enjoy your time in Sydney’s ramshackle but exceptionally diverse massage shop world. Please feel free to correct errors, disagree with any point that I’ve made, or fill gaps. If you want to do me a favour, PM a hot tip about a naturally busty massage girl!
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