Originally Posted by
LoveGlove
Spunting
.........If Punting was a Professional Sport:
- Punters, WLs, MLs would be athletes.
- Punters who take performance enhancing substances eg cialis or viagra would be called drug cheats
- China would have the largest representation of female athletes at the punting games
- China, Korea and Thailand would be the top tier nations competing at the games.
- Punters who can’t get across the line, would be disqualified
- Premature Ejaculation would be called as a False Start.
- For the well hung bros, Anal would have a technical difficulty of 9.5
- Timekeepers would be called mamasans or papasans
- Doubles or trebles would be called synchronised swimming
- 3hr punts would be called a marathon
- 30min punts would be called the 100 metre dash
- Gay sex would be called fencing aka the crossing of swords
- Snakin’ would be considered a demonstration sport
- The sporting program would be called the daily roster
- RnT would be like the Commonwealth games; nobody gives a fuck, but occassionaly may indulge in it.
- Cowgirl, Reverse Cowgirl, Straddle and Side Saddle would be an equestrian sport
- The bed/massage table would be the podium
- Athletes who don't qualify for the punting games, would automatically qualify for the Masturbation games.
- victory lap celebrations would be called fake moaning with orgasm.
- A towel would be the punters national flag
- A punter with a towel wrapped around his waist would be that athlete doing the victory lap with his national flag.
- Condoms/rubbers would called joggers/runners.
- Barebacking would be like competing in track events without joggers/runners..
- Brothelcreeper would be that small Kenyan athlete who competes without joggers/runners.
Hopefully I’ve covered it all....
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