Originally Posted by
Zinzan
It is my turn to fall on my sword. Punting is a lonely past time and I am not in a position to discuss this with anyone. Hence when something goes wrong the only avenue to emotionally dump is a forum such as this.
I fell for a WL, yet there were so many red flags during my time with her that I ignored and still continued thinking that there was a light at the end of the tunnel.
As some background, I have seen over 50 individual sex workers over the previous year. 6 of these girls have become regular ladies who I have seen over half a dozen times each. The thing I liked about these regular girls were that they are half my age and they are the ideal “no strings attached” sexual encounters. Sure, there is a lot of flirtations activity, however, there was never any discussion about developing a relationship. For one hour we would love each other and then walk away. These girls knew I fucked other girls and I knew they fucked other blokes.
I met a new girl 4 months ago. From our first time together I was completely smitten. It is very difficult to reflect on what made this so different. Even from this first meeting the first red flag was obvious. This girl lied about her age. My view was that she was 15 years older than what she advertised.
I ignored this because she was in an age group that I could relate to.
At our first meeting she began her honey trap which I also ignored as the second red flag.
She told me that no one had made her feel the way I had. It became obvious why. My modus operandi is always to take the girl on a sexual journey, where they are the co-stars in an intimate girlfriend experience. She loved being treated with so much respect and that she was able to feel unprecedented pleasure.
I suggested to her that by telling me how I made her feel was the usual thing she would say to any customer. She was so adamant that this was the first time she ever said this to anyone, I almost believed her.
This girl told me that she protects herself by taking control of proceedings and therefore remains aloof during her sex work encounters. In the end her customer walks away feeling they have got what they have paid for and she has earned her fee.
In my case she let her emotions get the better of her. As each session progressed her wall continued to crumble and in recent encounters she has relaxed to the point that her orgasms have come freely, are more intense, and in bigger numbers.
I wrote a review of her which managed to attract over 3000 views. This must have increased her business out of sight.
Each time we met in the bedroom she gushed about what I was doing for her, both physically and emotionally.
Here were more red flags. What I missed here was that my emotional energy was assisting her in growing her self esteem and confidence. I will explain further.
In our second bedroom encounter she suggested that we meet socially and get to know each other more, outside the bedroom.
Our social meetings were always early in the morning. Her reasoning was that she worked during the night and having breakfast and a walk was good for her to wind down.
Interestingly she told me that her night work was that she transported her girls to outcalls. Her girls meaning that she had a fledgling agency business. This has become another red flag.
The salient points of our social meetings were her background, the reasons why she was in the sex business, what her goals are, and her emotional condition. She told me about how she had no confidence in herself and that she lacked self esteem. She told me that she had one close friend, and me in her life. She told me that her life is private and she does not want people knowing too much about her. She told me that she had no regular customers apart from me. I scoffed at this admittance. One day she told me that my view of escorting was wrong. Apart from the no regular issue she told me that all her bookings came on the day of the encounter. No customer pre booked. (Something I have always done with her. I will always pre-arrange a meeting with her at least 3 days in advance.) I found this no pre booking thing odd. There were so many more deep and meaningful issues that she covered. I continued to grow more and more attached to her with our meetings either in the bedroom or at our early morning meetings, even though there were so many red flags screaming at me to let this go.
Going back to the privacy thing I mentioned above, I felt very privileged that she was trusting me enough to let me into her life, all be it with some areas in her life that were taboo subjects.
Another red flag I missed during our 4 months together. When I started booking her, she would come back to me within the hour telling me she couldn’t wait to see me and she was counting down the days. Over the last 6 weeks her response has become less verbose and less timely. Her responses have now only come the night before our meeting with one word “okay”.
Our early morning social meetings are always organised the week before. Recently her punctuality has slipped badly. When she arrives at these social meetings late, she does not apologise. When I quiz her about being late her excuse is always “crazy people”. I ask who they are. She says “girls and customers”. Nothing else.
These last 6 weeks have seen her behaviour change which has corresponded with her being more confident in herself. I have seen this in the way she now makes love with me and her more detailed conversations. I have seen this rather timid girl’s personality and confidence grow. She now keeps eye contact through all conversations, and in the bedroom when we make love she is not embarrassed by continued eye contact.
In 4 months I have seen this girl grow. Each week I have always sent her a message telling her how fantastic she is, how her continuous improvement strategies were paying dividends, and how she must feel so proud of herself with her emotional growth. She wanted my help to become a better person like me. Up until a month ago she would always respond to my messages. In the last month this has not happened.
About a month ago she told me she was having a private photo shoot. This girl has regularly posted photos of herself on twitter. Some are rather risqué, but nothing obscene. Her comments on these photos have always been non sexual.
Recently these new photos of her have appeared on twitter. This set of photos are a lot more revealing and she has ramped up the innuendo comments on her twitter feed.
I must say that as the photos were hitting my feed, my heart sank.
This week we had the very best love making session together.
The next day her latest photo killed me. Not only the photo but the comments attached to the photo.
It was now obvious that I had been taken advantage of. Her comments revealed that over the last 4 months “I have met so many amazing new regular clients who have turned out to be life-long friends. I am so excited to regularly speak to these friends who have helped me through a very dark period in my life. You will all be impressed how I am continually improving myself to be a better person”.
This comment completely flawed me. The whole subterfuge of her having me to improve her ego, confidence and self esteem took me by surprise. I really thought I read her well. Turns out I was just another mug in a long line of suitors who she deliberately honey trapped to make her feel better.
Where to from here? I have not spoken to her since last Tuesday. This is the longest time we have gone without speaking since we met. New Year has come and gone without a squeak.
I have to let her go now. I have served my purpose and I need to feel proud that I had some influence in her growing as a person. She has more confidence and more self esteem. Lucky that this happened after 4 months. It may have been a lot more difficult had it gone on longer.
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