Originally Posted by
silverfox1985
Ok before I start my story, I wanna say that there are three signs indicating imminent danger
1. WG has a pattern of asking financial assistance with increasing frequency and no intention to pay back
2. WG asks expensive jewelry and design brands
3. WG asks about your residential status and your willingness to sponsor her visa (partner sponsorship)
When you notice these signs, red flag up, mission abort and run!
I have been hanging out with this Chinese WG almost a year. We are from the same place (hometown), but she is from more of the rural area. She asked for my WeChat after me seeing her the sixth time. We started messaging each other, then I asked her out. Be honest, I would not do it, if we were not from the same place. It’s just too risky if the WG is from another nationality. The Aussie-Thai/Indonesian/Korean WG couple does not normally end well. Nothing racial here.
We started dating, dinner, drinks, Chinese movies (her English is quite limited, so we can only watch Chinese movies in cinema). After we were closer, she started visiting my place. In one occasion, she even did some cooking for me. We also went short trips (like Wollongong, Hunter Valley). We know each other pretty well now (legal names, DOBs, where we worked, how much we earn, etc) except that she never told me where she lives. Considering she is living with some illegal migrants, it is understandable that she has such protocol.
We did get into fight (not relating to her line of work) occasionally, and I was so pissed off and asked her to delete my contact once. Lucky she didn’t do it.
When we spent time together, we did have sex. But I did not initiate it and only did it when she gave the clear signal.
We give each other gifts from time to time (i.e. Xmas, birthday etc). I bought her a Kate Spade wallet, she would buy me a Tommy Hifilger jacket. If I bought her some tableware, she would buy me some home decoration. She paid for things when we were out too. Like when we stayed in Hunter Valley, she took care of all food bills since I booked the accommodation.
Money wise, sometimes she asked my help to send money ($10k, $20k, etc) home to pay off her debts (banks and private loans - it’s common in China). Clearly she doesn’t know how to use NetBank and mobile apps. I use Remitly or Panda remit, sometimes the Foreign Exchange agency in Chinatown). She told me that she felt safe for me to handle this for her. There was one time she even asked me to keep her cash like $30k in my place for a few days (she used to live in a house with landlord, and they had a dispute, the landlord wanted to kick her out. She kept all her money home and was worried that the landlord might break in and took the money).
This definitely took an emotional toll, as it is not pleasant to know that the girl you are fond of sucked dicks and gets fucked in different positions 10 times in a row everyday. It took a heavy toll on her as well. She told me that this line of work completely changed her perception of sex and people’s character (she called it the line work without any morality and bottom line). Sometimes when she felt too much pressure, she might snap and stay in bed for an entire day.
Her family is pretty fucked up as far as I know. But there is one thing she keeps away from me that is she has not divorced yet and has a 7-year old kid. I actually know it because one of my schoolmate is a senior manager in her old place of work in China. I asked her a few times and also gave indication that I actually knew it like “I don’t mind that you are a mum”. She neither admitted nor denied, and always kept silent or said things like: “if you believe that is the case, so be it.” If she trusted me with her cash, why not just be open about it? I don’t know……
Now I’m not sure how this would eventually turn out. She did ask me if I had a gf or wife or ever sponsored anyone when we went out the first time. But never asked anything about visa sponsorship again. If she is fishing, then I’m definitely not a big fish in pond although I do have a decent job, an apartment (with mortgage!) and an Aussie passport. Sometimes I felt like she’s like my younger sister (but in a twisted way, coz you are not supposed to sleep with your sister).
I reckon in her situation, she definitely wants something out of me. Maybe she just needs some support/comfort here or she has not made her mind yet, or she is planning something in a longer term or she will eventually return to her husband and kid and we just say goodbye and never meet again. If she tells me everything I need to know, I don’t mind giving her a ticket out. But I’m not sure what she is up to.
All comments are welcome, fellow punters, but please do not judge.