Buzzkills and sobering moments

[rmpgejxson]

A few weeks ago I was at my regular private who I see for a massage and body rub. I’ve been seeing this girl a couple times a month for just under a year, and enjoyed the dynamic of minimal talk.

The intensity was picking up, as it does with a massage, and so before the flip I had already pulled down her panties and was rubbing her pussy. After a few minutes and completely unprompted, she says to me “you know that doesn’t really excite me”. Me, still thinking with my little brain, rubbed her clit and and asked, even this? She then goes ahead to give a 5 min explanation about how she only feels horny with people she has an emotional connection to or that she’s in love with. She then says that for her this is just work and while I may be horny and excited for her it’s just her job and she sees multiple guys a day so she doesn’t get horny when she works. She said that i can rub but she’s not really excited and she’s only excited with her boyfriend.

Needless to say that was a huge and unnecessary buzzkill and completely ruined the vibe. I could feel the blood rushing from my cock back to my brain. It’s was like post nut clarity but before the nut. Now nothing she said was a surprise to me but I am a firm believer that I’m paying for the experience and not just a handjob. When I say stuff like “I love your ass” to a girl I can guarantee you that as soon as cum all that goes out the window and I completely forget about the girl till I’m horny two weeks later. I also know when working girls say stuff like that back it’s because I’m paying and they want a repeat customer. So why not play along I don’t understand, and it’s never happened to me at all. Everywhere else is the opposite, somehow every mamasan thinks I have a “big” cock which I know is bs but it’s part of what I’m paying for. I can have that chat for the missus but when I’m paying for it I’m paying for the whole experience not what she finds emotionally arousing. Frankly I couldn’t care less if she was horny or not, but don’t ruin the vibe?

Needless to say the allure had gone and I haven’t felt like going there in a couple months.

Anyone else have similar experiences?

[andrewv]

She was too honest and stood to lose you as a client. But she is definitely right. Working ladies are "at work" to make money.

Not a single ML or WL wakes up in the morning and looks forward to starting her shift because of the amazing orgasms all these pay-by-the-hour (or 30 minutes) punters will give her.

It is all about the $$$$ for them, which is the reality of it. There is nothing dishonest about it.

What men do is they "suspend reality" to get aroused and blow our rocks off..... It's like when you watch a movie, you don't think of the cameras and microphones and lights, and don't think the actors are simply acting the scene.

[GoldfishMan]

Fark me, I feel for you bro OP, that was a shitty experience. Sounds like she's had enough of this profession. Time to "dump" her and move on.

[schloong]

Yeap - totally agree there GoldfishMan...

[hadog]

Yeah I'd be moving on.

Agreed, you pay for the experience and the fantasy, not "truth bombs". I know none of the ladies I see would even slightly turn their head in the street if I walked past. But I am paying for that fantasy and suspend my reality for 45mins.

Move on, find a provider who knows this.

[trampslikeus55]

I agree with replies so far. I think you were either dumped or slapped down. See how you feel after a couple of days. You know what your going to get from her. If that is not what you want then the search will go on. Good health and good luck 👍

[Abracadabra]

It's generally accepted most girls would be somewhere else, doing something else if possible and customers pay for and rely on them being willing to provide an agreed service, which entails some degree of acting on their part, but in essence requires them to meet an acceptable service standard.
In this instance, she may not have liked what the OP was doing, but providing it wasn't a pain, comfort or consent issue she could have just played along, like most do and the session would have likely finished ok.
The "boner killer" comment was unnecessary.
As others have said, put a line through her...

[11Bravo]

I agree that they're ALL actresses and you're paying for their performance. But even a great actress can flub her lines every now and again. Maybe it had been a LONG day and she was just tired of too much audience participation, just one too many of those juniors (NOT YOU) who think they're doing this truly for HER pleasure.

You just caught the brunt and were considered expendable.

andrewv, as usual, spot-on.

[Oosuki]

Not really a buzzkill? Couple of weeks ago had a thai ml so the massage was good. Wasn't feeling particularly tired/exhausted, but no matter how much TT was given I just couldn't get it up. Had it been my regular everything would of been fine and dandy. Even on the flip after some groin work, nothing still. Felt a little bad mainly cos the ml was nice but it definitely gave the room an awkward feeling... eventually did somehow get over the line after a bit of imagination in the end.

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[Zoobender]

A few weeks ago I was at my regular private who I see for a massage and body rub. I’ve been seeing this girl a couple times a month for just under a year, and enjoyed the dynamic of minimal talk.

The intensity was picking up, as it does with a massage, and so before the flip I had already pulled down her panties and was rubbing her pussy. After a few minutes and completely unprompted, she says to me “you know that doesn’t really excite me”. Me, still thinking with my little brain, rubbed her clit and and asked, even this? She then goes ahead to give a 5 min explanation about how she only feels horny with people she has an emotional connection to or that she’s in love with. She then says that for her this is just work and while I may be horny and excited for her it’s just her job and she sees multiple guys a day so she doesn’t get horny when she works. She said that i can rub but she’s not really excited and she’s only excited with her boyfriend.

Needless to say that was a huge and unnecessary buzzkill and completely ruined the vibe. I could feel the blood rushing from my cock back to my brain. It’s was like post nut clarity but before the nut. Now nothing she said was a surprise to me but I am a firm believer that I’m paying for the experience and not just a handjob. When I say stuff like “I love your ass” to a girl I can guarantee you that as soon as cum all that goes out the window and I completely forget about the girl till I’m horny two weeks later. I also know when working girls say stuff like that back it’s because I’m paying and they want a repeat customer. So why not play along I don’t understand, and it’s never happened to me at all. Everywhere else is the opposite, somehow every mamasan thinks I have a “big” cock which I know is bs but it’s part of what I’m paying for. I can have that chat for the missus but when I’m paying for it I’m paying for the whole experience not what she finds emotionally arousing. Frankly I couldn’t care less if she was horny or not, but don’t ruin the vibe?

Needless to say the allure had gone and I haven’t felt like going there in a couple months.

Anyone else have similar experiences?

This sounds like Jolie haha. I was with her once and she said her hands were tired and I wasn't coming yet. It was 20mins into 30mins session and 10mins of play lol. She said I should see a different girl if I don't find her attractive, totally killed the mood haha. I didn't go back to see her again but I've read some similar stories. If it's her then there are better girls out there.

[sunnyboy0426]

Not exactly the same situation, but I had gone to legit massage place for a couple of years and never got anything but did great massages. They had a new girl helping out and gave some teases each time I saw her but never expected anything. One day she was really close and friendly and got the feeling she might actually be interested. So booked her specifically next time and she was working alone and she went all in with the teasing and gave an amazing HE. Booked again next week and she was alone again and even more into it and had my foot

[Meng]

Not exactly the same situation, but I had gone to legit massage place for a couple of years and never got anything but did great massages. They had a new girl helping out and gave some teases each time I saw her but never expected anything. One day she was really close and friendly and got the feeling she might actually be interested. So booked her specifically next time and she was working alone and she went all in with the teasing and gave an amazing HE. Booked again next week and she was alone again and even more into it and had my foot rubbing her pussy while she was massaging the legs and finished with HE, but wasn't that keen on too much touching with hands.

Booked again next week and she had previously told me how much she like a certain food, so bought her some dinner as it was a late booking and she seems so happy. Then during the massage she didn't tease one bit and seemed off ...I asked if she was okay and she said of course and I was wondering if I had fckd up somehow and thought maybe she's just having a bad day.

Booked next week again and was the same...no teasing and very clinical. I was actually feeling hurt cuz thought she might have actually liked me.... Kept trying to think what I did to fck it all up?? Maybe the boss got wind of what was happening?

Did you tip her for the HE during the times she did it? If so then maybe she's just had a off day.

[11Bravo]

I was actually feeling hurt cuz thought she might have actually liked me.... Kept trying to think what I did to fck it all up?? Maybe the boss got wind of what was happening?
Reread andrewv, then repeat, "It's just business".

The waitress who's happy to see a repeat customer, smiles, asks if you'd like more sauce on your steak... She wants your business and, in some places, hoping for a bigger tip (and not your penis). It's business.

The cashier at Coles, recognizing you, bit of chat as she checks you out (not YOU, but your groceries), maybe even telling you that you should get two as it's BOGOF. It's business.

The cute girl at the ice cream shop, she remembers what you order, maybe a slightly deeper dip for your cone, she wants you to come back for more business. It's business.

In all of the above, as with the providers in the industry, it's just BUSINESS and they are WORKING; you're just one with a long queue behind you.

Not saying don't be nice. They do appreciate repeat BUSINESS, a nice guy. Happy to see you, for the BUSINESS. If you've ever worked customer service, you'll understand. Some clients you enjoy seeing, it's a pleasant time, others not so much. But for all, it IS WORK, BUSINESS. Repetitious, right. You're doing this for the money.

When I'm nice to someone, I DON'T expect a quid pro quo. I do it for MYSELF (selfish, I know), because it makes ME feel good. That way, I'm NEVER disappointed.

I wouldn't take it personally. Maybe the return for her was just not worth the expenditure, businesswise.

BOTTOM LINE: It's a transactional BUSINESS. Never forget that. (What can I say, I'm not that much of a romantic).

[sunnyboy0426]

I know it's all transactional and all business and had very mechanical HEs knowing I'm going in for one and its on offer.

But couldn't help get a little crushed and disappointed when she decided to turn off the tap.

[Zoobender]

Yes $50 for the HE on each occasion.

I know it's all transactional and all business and had very mechanical HEs knowing I'm going in for one and its on offer.

But couldn't help get a little crushed and disappointed when she decided to turn off the tap.

The dinner fucked it up mate. Girls like to feel sexy and they want that excitement. IMO when you got her dinner it got to her head and she probably started thinking too much about the situation ie do I want to date a client, what if he tells others to come see me etc etc. And then she got the ick. My advise is not to do anything nice for the girl at all. Until you have sex. Then you can reward her. Once you buy presents or dinner or do anything thoughtful to early it can backfire. Ie I used to see a girl who would do all the extras for me without extra fees. She would be naked from the get go and we spend alot of time enjoying each other. So much so that I started to like her, she told me her favourite drink and the next time I saw her I bought it for her. She was actually turned off. She was like I don't want you to but me anything, I fell bad because I can't repay you for it etc. She was nice about it but she got the ick. If I had just kept going by playing it cool she would have been at my place after a few visits. Saw her 10 times atleast before the drink incident. And then the feeling wasn't the same.

[sunnyboy0426]

The dinner fucked it up mate. Girls like to feel sexy and they want that excitement. IMO when you got her dinner it got to her head and she probably started thinking too much about the situation ie do I want to date a client, what if he tells others to come see me etc etc. And then she got the ick. My advise is not to do anything nice for the girl at all. Until you have sex. Then you can reward her. Once you buy presents or dinner or do anything thoughtful to early it can backfire. Ie I used to see a girl who would do all the extras for me without extra fees. She would be naked from the get go and we spend alot of time enjoying each other. So much so that I started to like her, she told me her favourite drink and the next time I saw her I bought it for her. She was actually turned off. She was like I don't want you to but me anything, I fell bad because I can't repay you for it etc. She was nice about it but she got the ick. If I had just kept going by playing it cool she would have been at my place after a few visits. Saw her 10 times atleast before the drink incident. And then the feeling wasn't the same.

My initial gut reaction was the dinner fckd it up... It was such a sudden change in behaviour from the previous visits. Lessons learnt.

[Johny77]

My initial gut reaction was the dinner fckd it up... It was such a sudden change in behaviour from the previous visits. Lessons learnt.

She was probably concerned you had developed feelings and may have misinterpreted your reasoning. I am sure most are quite guarded and do not want to get involved with customers. Just my thoughts.

[Double_Adapter]

My initial gut reaction was the dinner fckd it up... It was such a sudden change in behaviour from the previous visits. Lessons learnt.

Yep, dinner definitely fucked it for you bro. By being distant, cold and keeping you at arms length she's actually doing you a favour. She's not reciprocating your emotional and/or sexual advances coz she doesn't want to lead you on and cause you future heartache.

In all other businesses it's common practice for people to show appreciation through lunches, dinners, gifting, overseas trips, junkets, tickets to sporting events etc it's about establishing commercial relationships and hopefully repeat business. The difference here is that clients don't get clingy, needy, desperate, resort to stalking, don't give expensive gifts, send 'lovey dovey' text messages each day and don't catch the feels or fall in love with their service providers.

[GoldfishMan]

My initial gut reaction was the dinner fckd it up... It was such a sudden change in behaviour from the previous visits. Lessons learnt.

Don’t think too much about it bro. It could’ve been anything. Maybe a coincidence that something might have changed in her situation (boss found out, she got a new BF, etc) at the same time as you buying her dinner. Whatever it is, it’s over, time to move on.

[cplurt2]

Listen to goldfish man mah brother . Be a goldfish and you will have no worries

[sunnyboy0426]

Appreciate all the advice and this thread has helped me push closer to the 50 post mark, so there's that!

I had a good 24-48hr stew and moved on.

[JJBlows]

As OP said she said she actually gets aroused with by her boyfriend or emotional connections and because of that something clicked in her brain one day whilst with a customer that made her realise she hates this job.

Many girls are in it for the money. Some have family dept, mentally fucked in the head, houses to pay off and retire early etc etc but they are still woman with feelings and just like us they can get attached to men, even customers sometimes, just for her she woke up one day and shuddered at the thought of us lying on that table serving us rather than pleasure a guy she actually likes

But she just shouldn't have said anything though.

[BubbaDiesel]

Yea that seems kinda unnecessary but also I kinda get it. They're just humans like all of us horny bastards and maybe it was too much for her that day. Still sucks about the timing though, that's not when you wanna hear a truth bomb lol

Eh, whaddya gonna do? There's always the next punt.

[Niceguy11]

What a shit situation. I would get rid of her and move on. You are paying so she should either go along with it or not say anything. Yeah she is honest but its not the time to say that stuff.

[priapus1966]

Fark me, I feel for you bro OP, that was a shitty experience. Sounds like she's had enough of this profession. Time to "dump" her and move on.

Alternatively she could have become bored, not with the job but with rpmg... and this was her way of getting rid of him. The arrangement doesn't seem to have developed much to her (financial) advantage over an a extended period, so perhaps this was just her way of moving him on in favour of a better prospect. Stuff happens, it is what it is.