New Guy Experience + Seeking Advice

[PsyPsy]

Hello everyone, long time lurker here and I felt I finally needed to contribute.

I'm making this post to share my experiences visiting MLs and WLs as a guy very inexperienced in sex.
The purpose is to share a couple of tips for people visiting the first time and to hopefully help others who are in a similar situation to me.

I'm also seeking advice myself and recommendations

Me:
Between 20-30
Short
Quite Skinny
Never had a GF
Never had sex (before the visits)
Not very confident
Indecisive
Horrible storyteller.

Summary of visits so far
So far I've visited 3 WLs and 2 MLs, each at different locations.
I will give a rating to each in a similar format to others, but I feel I lack a sufficient baseline to make a proper rating.
If I felt satisfied, I'll generally give an 8. I won't give 10s, there could be others better I haven't had a chance to visit.
(Some of these visits were a long time ago, so don't go pointing out contradictions if you have evidence the girl was on holiday or something)

J/R Amber Ginza Club
Date of visit: sometime in either 2021 or 2022
Cost: Paid for 30 minutes (big mistake, more on this below)
Face: 7.5/10
Body: 8.5/10
She had a nice body, loved her boobs.
Service: 8/10

Services provided: Shower Together, BBBJ, HJ, DFK.

I travelled to GC and was too nervous to walk in, spending 20 minutes weirdly pacing back and forth around the back door. Eventually I saw someone else buzz and walk in, and it gave me the courage to do the same. 2 guys greeted me at reception and I asked for a recommendation for someone visiting a WL for the first time. They recommended Amber and in the end I chose 30 minutes. I assumed since it was my first time, the very touch of a woman would make me explode. Oh how very wrong I was.

I was guided to the room and waited. The red lighting was really throwing me off in a strange way and me being super nervous wasn't helping. Eventually Amber walked in and greeted and told me to undress and she did the same. I couldn't help but watch and salivate as she did so (still do this for every ML and WL, hope they don't mind). Mouth wash was handed to me and we began the shower, where she washed my groin area.

After drying off Amber told me to get onto the bed, and she gave a mix of HJ, BBBJ and DFK over the remaining time. Initially I told myself to try holding back from cumming, but as time ticked on I realised my issue was not being able to cum. Earlier in the morning I had already masturbated once. I discussed with Amber and I asked for an extension, but in the end I couldn't (something about how extensions are for when you change your mind after seeing the girl initially, i.e. I needed to extend in the first few minutes). Amber offered FS to see if that would help me cum, but I declined (at this time I was still hoping to save my first time for when I get a GF). I left feeling quite embarrassed with myself.


What I learned:

Don't fap for a while before visiting
Don't book 30 minutes, too rushed
Shave before visiting a WL (applies to MLs too)
Book in advance (one less thing to worry about)
Try smiling more?



C Jay N5M
Date of visit: sometime in late 2023
Cost: $300 for 1 hr
Face: 9/10
She had a pretty face and big eyes.
Body: 8.5/10
Loved her petite build, heard from ARs she was gaining weight, but I saw none of this
Service: 9/10

Services provided: Shower Together, BBBJ, HJ, DFK, FS.

I decided to visit C Jay in N5M for few reasons. 1, she was quite my type, 2 she had a couple of good ARs, and 3, due to her being deaf and mute. My thought process was that it would be easier for me to perform if I didn't have to worry about trying to moan or grunt (I heard girls like it when guys do this, please correct me if I'm wrong). I made a booking for 12pm some day. This time I didn't cum for about 2 week before visiting.

After only pacing outside about for 5 minutes this time, I entered the front door of N5M and was greeted by the long hallway. The receptionist confirmed my booking and ushered me into the closest room, where I waited a few minutes before Jay showed up. I communicated with her using her translator app that I hoped she could lead as I was inexperienced, which she nodded to. Shower was nice, washed me up before ushering me out so she could do her own thing.

After getting on the bed, she began alternating between a BBBJ and HJ + DFK with a 69 afterwards. Compared to my first visit, Jay felt much more affectionate. Still however, finishing was difficult for me. She dommed me up and began her FS. I had finally lost my v-card!. We switched between CG and missionary, trying out a big of doggy in between (didn't enjoy it). Previous ARs spoke of Jay's amazing CG and they weren't lying. She would bring my head to her chest for me where I would lick and nibble her nipples. I think I nibbled a bit too hard once and she didn't like it, so I stopped doing it.

Honestly speaking however, everything thus far had just felt good/ok (should be me, not Jay's fault), and I was struggling to finish. It took a lot of mental effort and in the end I half finished(?) inside the dom. (It's like cum came out but I didn't fully orgasm). We had about 10 minutes remaining and we just cuddled and chatted using the translator.

What I learned
Good to not fap for the 2 weeks
Don't bite her nipples too hard, sex irl is probably not like porn
Learn to 69 better

V Mellisa Saigon Princess St Marys
Date of visit: October 2024
Cost: $70 for the massage and $150 for extra B2B, NHJ and BBBJ
Face: 8/10
Quite a sexy face
Body: 9/10
Massive ass, tits, and very smooth skin.
Service: 5/10

I decided to try out a ML place since my new work was doing my neck in a little. I didn't have a preference for ML in particular on their roster, so I decided to walk in. I was greeted, paid the $70 for the hour. Entered the room where I was told to strip and lie on the table. Mellisa soon walked in and began her massage. I didn't particularly tell her to focus on my neck and, but I had assumed whatever massage was performed should sufficiently cover my needs. This time i didn't masturbate for a few days before visiting.

Part 1 was quite disappointing, there was no pressure and it just felt like I was being felt up instead of being massaged. I didn't ask, as I decided to just let it run. (It could be that she though since I was skinny I couldn't handle too much pressure)

Part 2 she asked what I wanted and I opted for B2B, NHJ, and BBBJ. I'm guessing she thought I would come very quickly, which I didn't. After only a few minutes total of BBBJ, she started to only switch between the NHJ and B2B. B2B was actually quite nice and it was the most enjoyable part of the massage. The NHJ on the other hand was a different story. It's definitely not her first time, but she was jerking it so hard and fast it hurt more than it felt good. I asked her to stop and return to a BJ, but she was quite hesitant. In the end, she went back outside to grab a bag for a CBJ which she did a bit of. (Looking back, I'm assuming she didn't want cum in her mouth). I couldn't cum and we finished there.

What I learned
Nothing really, aside from not visiting here again

J Marie Ginza Empire
Date of visit: November 2024
Cost: $300 for 1 hr
Face: 8/10
Face was good, but I recall being slightly disappointed.
Body: 8.5/10
Tight body, lean but not too much. Nothing bad, but nothing special to comment on.
Service: 9/10

Services provided: Shower Together with DFK and BBBJ, BBBJ, HJ, DFK, FS.

As an inexperienced guy still, I was hoping for the WL to take the lead in sessions. Upon my research, I ended up settling with J Marie. I messaged on WeChat booked her for a 2pm some weekday. I showed up about 5 minutes early, and the guys at the reception told me to wait in her room. It was quite a long wait, around 15 minutes before she came. Did not help with my nerves, but I'm fine waiting if they're delayed. This time I didn't orgasm for 2 weeks before visiting.

When she did finally come, she was very sweet. English is quite good and was attentive and my nerves calmed down slowly. Shower service with the DFK and BBBJ was nice, but I wasn't very comfortable in their small shower. Onto the bed, the service was quite similar to C Jay's, starting with a BBBJ and HJ + DFK. I love DFK, it's a massive turn on when I watch JAV but Marie's breath that day was a little off and eventually started avoiding it.

Onto the FS part, she grabbed a dom but changed her mind and searched for a larger one (confidence booster there, maybe it's a WL trick for guys like me haha). FS positions included CG, missionary, lotus, and a bit of doggy. She was moaning quite a bit (both in English and Japanese surprisingly), and for me personally I didn't know what to make of it. Was she actually feeling good or was it just FOAM? Can't really tell, don't have enough experience. In the end thoughts like this kept poking in the back of my head and made it too difficult for me to come. Marie apologised for being unable to do so. Kissed me goodbye on the lips. On the way out the guys at the reception asked for a rating, and I just said 8/10 to keep it simple. (I don't feel I have the knowledge and experience to make a review, bit like a first time drinker at a wine tasting event)

What I learned
Compatibility is a must, Marie is good but I think we're not clicking together somewhere


C Ling Carlingford
Date of visit: 4pm Saturday February 2025
Cost: $75 for 1 hr massage and $50 for extra B2B, NHJ (+$20 tip at the end)
Face: 7.5/10
Looks to be about 30s or 40s (bad at judging though)
Body: 8.5/10
Big tits, nice ass. Curvy or chubby depending on the person.
Service: 9.5/10

I decided to seek another ML as a reward for myself for actually completing my gym routine (kinda stupid, i know). I parked nearby and entered the rear entrance with pretty low expectations given my previous experience. Ling greeted and I paid and I was asked to strip and lie down on the table.

Part 1 was excellent, I wasn't feeling particularly sore anyway, but Ling really knows how to massage properly. I wasn't especially keeping track of time, but nothing was rushed. I really want to visit one of the popular MLs and compare to see how she fares against some of the more well known MLs, however Ling is leaving soon anyway and likely won't return.

Part 2 started and I said to her that I didn't want to cum today. I thought I would enjoy the session more if I just focused on the moment and not trying my hardest to cum. She agreed thought was a little confused by my request. Started off with a NHJ. In part 1 I opted for no oil, but it was quite needed for part 2. Technique was fine, though for some reason, my dick just felt really ticklish more than it felt good, especially around the head area. After a few minutes of this I couldn't take it anymore and I asked for B2B, which felt really good, I liked feeling her weight on me and she kissed and licked my ear while I rubbed her butt. Eventually she switched back to NHJ and I asked if she could play with my balls. I wasn't expecting this next part, but she did this amazing thing where she would put her head below your dick while giving a NHJ. It gave the impression that she was sucking the underside of your dick without actually doing so.

After about 20 minutes of part 2 (could be more, wasn't keeping track of time), I asked for the time remaining and she said about 10 minutes. I asked if I could massage her to finish up. My technique was garbage so I asked for her feedback, which she gave. Some of her reactions were fake compliments, but eventually by repeating some of the techniques she performed on me earlier I was able to do some things right and make her feel good. We finished up and I paid the extra $50 and tipped $20.

What I learned
How to massage (a little). My tips are to take it slow and repeat some of the techniques performed on you previously while applying sufficient pressure.
Not all ML places suck, but YMMV depending on the ML


Seeking advice
I'm personally seeking advice from others who have been in a similar situation and recommendations for WLs. I believe my issues with being unable to cum stem from both my nerves and death grip syndrome (partially still in denial for DGS).

For recommendations I'm looking for someone who can really take the lead during the session while also being very affectionate. I'm considering booking a WL around 170cm in height for a tall girl short guy experience, was thinking someone like K Jessie from GC. (Not sure if I'll be into Koreans though, haven't listened to Kpop enough or watched any Kdramas).




Shoutout
Somewhere else on the site there was a thread from someone who was in a similar situation (suspiciously similar actually), and it was great knowing that I wasn't alone (link below if you want to check it out). I have formatted in a similar way.
http://www.aus99forum.com/showthread.php?107414-Can-t-Cum

[ironmonk]

Hey man, good thread and interesting topic.

I'm also mid 20s, tbh I kinda had a similar problem to you initially (some degree of DGS), and watching porn from a young age when the brain was still developing has a lot of consequences. A lot of younger guys have the same issues too - quitting porn is practically a rite of passage.

not sure if you've read this thread or not, you might get some more insight
http://www.aus99forum.com/showthread.php?125677-Confessions-of-a-Soyboy

Some tips
- like the other thread says, get a fleshlight or something, ideally the loosest one possible. To get used to the sensation of the pussy. Try to stop using your hand
- get on NoFap, try once a week (w fleshlight) but don't beat yourself up if you 'relapse'
- eliminate all porn. Easier said than done, but there's little merit to watching it - it just makes you a cuck with fried dopamine receptors
- Your punts are very spaced out, I would ditch the massage and go straight to a brothel for FS (to get more direct "hands on" experience). I would also up the frequency for the short-medium term until you overcome your issues. 1x/week or 1x/fortnight if finances are tight.

The above (increased horniness + increased sensitivity) should help your brain associate ejaculating with a female, rather than your hand or to pixels.

For recommendations I strongly suggest K Ari at GE, she has a milfy vibe and is very big on DFK. She will take the lead. Her pussy is pretty tight too. Unfortunately I don't think she meets your 170cm criteria, I think she's 165cm or so.

Keep us updated on how it goes!

[PsyPsy]

Hey man, good thread and interesting topic.

I'm also mid 20s, tbh I kinda had a similar problem to you initially (some degree of DGS), and watching porn from a young age when the brain was still developing has a lot of consequences. A lot of younger guys have the same issues too - quitting porn is practically a rite of passage.

not sure if you've read this thread or not, you might get some more insight
http://www.aus99forum.com/showthread.php?125677-Confessions-of-a-Soyboy

Some tips
- like the other thread says, get a fleshlight or something, ideally the loosest one possible. To get used to the sensation of the pussy. Try to stop using your hand
- get on NoFap, try once a week (w fleshlight) but don't beat yourself up if you 'relapse'
- eliminate all porn. Easier said than done, but there's little merit to watching it - it just makes you a cuck with fried dopamine receptors
- Your punts are very spaced out, I would ditch the massage and go straight to a brothel for FS (to get more direct "hands on" experience). I would also up the frequency for the short-medium term until you overcome your issues. 1x/week or 1x/fortnight if finances are tight.

The above (increased horniness + increased sensitivity) should help your brain associate ejaculating with a female, rather than your hand or to pixels.

For recommendations I strongly suggest K Ari at GE, she has a milfy vibe and is very big on DFK. She will take the lead. Her pussy is pretty tight too. Unfortunately I don't think she meets your 170cm criteria, I think she's 165cm or so.

Keep us updated on how it goes!

I haven’t spotted that thread before, thanks for sharing. I’ve read through it and will try following some of the advice mentioned.
In particular i do think i plan too much, if i wake up horny it might just be best to book from whoever’s available.

I did get a fleshlight, but my experiences have been a bit mixed. Obviously I’m supposed to be training to get rid of DGS, but in the end i’m either edging for way too long or i’m using the flesh light in a way that mimics my causes of DGS.

I’ll try to up my visits for a while, you could be right saying my visits are too spaced out. Each time i go i’m still quite nervous

[11Bravo]

Advice that won't be taken


My advice to all young'ens: don't start. If you've started, stop. Take the money you save and go have some REAL LIFE experiences, some REAL LIFE relationships. With a real relationship, real emotions, I think all your problems will disappear. And if they don't, it'll be fun working through them with an emotional PARTNER.

P4P is just sex, NOTHING more. BUSINESS. It's an orgasm, nothing more. No emotional investment. As you're dressing, you can think of what groceries you need to buy on your way home. Too often, the inexperienced confuse sex with love. You need a real life foundation to keep you grounded when you're adding additional stories, and that's all P4P is.

Neither real life nor P4P is like porn. Porn, they're paid to be actresses, just like ML/WG's, but porn is pure fantasy. It has no basis in fact. It's for 2D stimulation, not 3D. It skews your expectations. Nothing wrong with it as long as you UNDERSTAND what it is.

Real relationships are work, 2 way streets. You have to be supportive, not financially, but emotionally. You have to take her good and bad, have to be there when you want to and when you don't. P4P is one-way, that's why you're paying. IMO, those who have too little real experience with the former, too much experience with the latter, they bring the P4P attitudes to the real world. Guaranteed to make your real short, few, and far between. On the other hand, bringing a bit of real into P4P gives you a bit of empathy for the provider, enhancing YOUR experience. Simply put, you treat her like an orifice, she'll be an orifice. Treat her like a person, she'll be a person.


Advice that might be taken


As others have said, or will say, stop with the porn. Lower your expectations, enjoy HER experience; it's just sex.

Check out the rosters, here and on Locanto. Get WeChat for rosters. Check out the photos. Yes, I know all about photos, but find someone who you find attractive in some way. NOT perfect, just something that intrigues you (nice rack, cute face, nice shape, nice smile). Rather than SYT's, I'd suggest older, at the lesser shops (heresy I know). But there, you have more of a chance to be seen as an INDIVIDUAL, rather than just another widget on the assembly line to be processed.

Book an hour. Take your time, relax, enjoy. For me, I don't consider the massage time wasted; it's relaxing, and can be quite nice. Or brothel path, enjoy the foreplay. My experience, older equates to more experience, better chance of a PSE experience if that's your thing, or even GFE. She appreciates the business and will work WITH you. See her more than once, so you feel comfortable with her. Be honest; they've heard IT ALL. Have realistic expectations; don't expect miracles, fireworks, angels singing. Like riding a bicycle. You fall a lot at first, but then, just pedal along and enjoy the ride, the scenery. Enjoy the trip; you'll come (pun intended) to the destination.


WADR, your asking for recommendations is part of your problem - choose for yourself, who intrigues YOU. Likewise, don't be concerned about nationalities - KPOP, Korean dramas have nothing to do with selection. An attractive woman is an attractive woman; nationality only pertinent if you're there for language school. There is no "best" nationality; it's all about personal dynamics.

Lastly, to repeat, P4P doesn't teach you anything about REAL LIFE relationships, doesn't prepare you for REAL LIFE. It's just a facade; recognize it as such.

[crhaayn]

Great advice above. I was in a similar situation to you when I first started. No girlfriend, no experience with intimacy, DGS after years of watching and jacking off to porn before finally actually having sex and losing my virginity in a brothel. It took multiple visits at different places to finally be able to cum from sex. Took me a while to find out what I liked, but when I did, I think I became addicted to it, and it became a regular habit of mine, even during relationships. It wasn't good. Even though I was detached emotionally during punts, obviously, partners in real relationships don't see it that way.

Regarding the advice you're seeking, I would've actually mentioned Amber from Ginza. Seeing as she was your first ever, there may have been some things in the way of you enjoying the session. But Amber is a seasoned veteran, so can lead, but can also be submissive as well, I think she's quite good at reading her customers and catering to them. She's a regular, and to me, she provides the most passionate service. I think you just need that find that connection for yourself. Jay from N5M was also a regular for me, for the same reasons as Amber. I think it just takes time, and trial and error, for you to find that for yourself. I can have a punt with the most gorgeous WL with the most service-focussed attitude, but if we don't click, I would not consider it a great punt.

If you're looking at Ginza's rosters, maybe go for the girls that have "Experienced" in their profile description. These girls generally are the ones that will take the lead in a session. Also, while on the topic of rosters and profiles, don't overthink and compare too much. Physical attributes are guidelines, and services provided are no indication of the quality that they can provide.

[Roydemeo]

What a grim collection of experiences that was jeez

[rooter]

Best advice I can give you is. Live at a moderate pace. Die middle aged. And leave a slightly overweight and wrinkled body that is still OK for organ donation. Don't get old and useless and a burden on yourself your family and society.

[fujama88]

My 2 cents. The punting experience is like red wine. The older you get, the better will be your experiences. Plus variety is the spice of life.

[Abracadabra]

Bloody hell mate ~ at 20, at least start out trying to live the "normal" life with a relationship that hopefully will provide all you need physically, mentally, emotionally and companionship that lasts a life time.

I met the mid western NSW farm girl, then the drop dead gorgeous Swedish girl in the Grand Hotel Stockholm and then the Irish dentist and then the Korean .......

Yep, they all crashed and burned and punting became the default in my late 30s .....and here I am.

But the last thing on my mind at 20 / 20s was WLs and punting.

Have a crack!!
Might surprise yourself....

[Putter]

My advice would be to see K Jessie , K Rebecca, J Aya or J Mio. They will make you comfortable and a great time. These sessions will show you the possibilities. The newbies can be experienced after. There’s plenty of time. No rush.

[Niceguy11]

Advice that won't be taken


My advice to all young'ens: don't start. If you've started, stop. Take the money you save and go have some REAL LIFE experiences, some REAL LIFE relationships. With a real relationship, real emotions, I think all your problems will disappear. And if they don't, it'll be fun working through them with an emotional PARTNER.

P4P is just sex, NOTHING more. BUSINESS. It's an orgasm, nothing more. No emotional investment. As you're dressing, you can think of what groceries you need to buy on your way home. Too often, the inexperienced confuse sex with love. You need a real life foundation to keep you grounded when you're adding additional stories, and that's all P4P is.

Neither real life nor P4P is like porn. Porn, they're paid to be actresses, just like ML/WG's, but porn is pure fantasy. It has no basis in fact. It's for 2D stimulation, not 3D. It skews your expectations. Nothing wrong with it as long as you UNDERSTAND what it is.

Real relationships are work, 2 way streets. You have to be supportive, not financially, but emotionally. You have to take her good and bad, have to be there when you want to and when you don't. P4P is one-way, that's why you're paying. IMO, those who have too little real experience with the former, too much experience with the latter, they bring the P4P attitudes to the real world. Guaranteed to make your real short, few, and far between. On the other hand, bringing a bit of real into P4P gives you a bit of empathy for the provider, enhancing YOUR experience. Simply put, you treat her like an orifice, she'll be an orifice. Treat her like a person, she'll be a person.


Advice that might be taken


As others have said, or will say, stop with the porn. Lower your expectations, enjoy HER experience; it's just sex.

Check out the rosters, here and on Locanto. Get WeChat for rosters. Check out the photos. Yes, I know all about photos, but find someone who you find attractive in some way. NOT perfect, just something that intrigues you (nice rack, cute face, nice shape, nice smile). Rather than SYT's, I'd suggest older, at the lesser shops (heresy I know). But there, you have more of a chance to be seen as an INDIVIDUAL, rather than just another widget on the assembly line to be processed.

Book an hour. Take your time, relax, enjoy. For me, I don't consider the massage time wasted; it's relaxing, and can be quite nice. Or brothel path, enjoy the foreplay. My experience, older equates to more experience, better chance of a PSE experience if that's your thing, or even GFE. She appreciates the business and will work WITH you. See her more than once, so you feel comfortable with her. Be honest; they've heard IT ALL. Have realistic expectations; don't expect miracles, fireworks, angels singing. Like riding a bicycle. You fall a lot at first, but then, just pedal along and enjoy the ride, the scenery. Enjoy the trip; you'll come (pun intended) to the destination.


WADR, your asking for recommendations is part of your problem - choose for yourself, who intrigues YOU. Likewise, don't be concerned about nationalities - KPOP, Korean dramas have nothing to do with selection. An attractive woman is an attractive woman; nationality only pertinent if you're there for language school. There is no "best" nationality; it's all about personal dynamics.

Lastly, to repeat, P4P doesn't teach you anything about REAL LIFE relationships, doesn't prepare you for REAL LIFE. It's just a facade; recognize it as such.

Yep, agree with everything said. Listen to 11Bravo for sure.

[madness123]

Yep, agree with everything said. Listen to 11Bravo for sure.

Yep, 100% sage advice

[rooter]

Eat. Punt. Die . Life is beautiful. Death is freedom . Enjoy!

[Brad-Pitt]

V Mellisa Saigon Princess St Marys
Date of visit: October 2024
Cost: $70 for the massage and $150 for extra B2B, NHJ and BBBJ
Face: 8/10
Quite a sexy face
Body: 9/10
Massive ass, tits, and very smooth skin.
Service: 5/10


Thanks for the AR's bro. You overpaid abit for SP. Its generally just $50 for NHJ there and $100 for BJ (whether you get BBBJ or CBJ is a different story). Some girls try to hustle for more tips.

You pretty much paid $220. May as well just go FS shop. I seen Melissa before. Her service is average and can be quite distant/cold. Compared to girls like Jessica & Carol who are quite engaging and are generally chatty & get to know you

[Endo123]

Advice that won't be taken


My advice to all young'ens: don't start. If you've started, stop. Take the money you save and go have some REAL LIFE experiences, some REAL LIFE relationships. With a real relationship, real emotions, I think all your problems will disappear. And if they don't, it'll be fun working through them with an emotional PARTNER.

P4P is just sex, NOTHING more. BUSINESS. It's an orgasm, nothing more. No emotional investment. As you're dressing, you can think of what groceries you need to buy on your way home. Too often, the inexperienced confuse sex with love. You need a real life foundation to keep you grounded when you're adding additional stories, and that's all P4P is.

Neither real life nor P4P is like porn. Porn, they're paid to be actresses, just like ML/WG's, but porn is pure fantasy. It has no basis in fact. It's for 2D stimulation, not 3D. It skews your expectations. Nothing wrong with it as long as you UNDERSTAND what it is.

Real relationships are work, 2 way streets. You have to be supportive, not financially, but emotionally. You have to take her good and bad, have to be there when you want to and when you don't. P4P is one-way, that's why you're paying. IMO, those who have too little real experience with the former, too much experience with the latter, they bring the P4P attitudes to the real world. Guaranteed to make your real short, few, and far between. On the other hand, bringing a bit of real into P4P gives you a bit of empathy for the provider, enhancing YOUR experience. Simply put, you treat her like an orifice, she'll be an orifice. Treat her like a person, she'll be a person.


Advice that might be taken


As others have said, or will say, stop with the porn. Lower your expectations, enjoy HER experience; it's just sex.

Check out the rosters, here and on Locanto. Get WeChat for rosters. Check out the photos. Yes, I know all about photos, but find someone who you find attractive in some way. NOT perfect, just something that intrigues you (nice rack, cute face, nice shape, nice smile). Rather than SYT's, I'd suggest older, at the lesser shops (heresy I know). But there, you have more of a chance to be seen as an INDIVIDUAL, rather than just another widget on the assembly line to be processed.

Book an hour. Take your time, relax, enjoy. For me, I don't consider the massage time wasted; it's relaxing, and can be quite nice. Or brothel path, enjoy the foreplay. My experience, older equates to more experience, better chance of a PSE experience if that's your thing, or even GFE. She appreciates the business and will work WITH you. See her more than once, so you feel comfortable with her. Be honest; they've heard IT ALL. Have realistic expectations; don't expect miracles, fireworks, angels singing. Like riding a bicycle. You fall a lot at first, but then, just pedal along and enjoy the ride, the scenery. Enjoy the trip; you'll come (pun intended) to the destination.


WADR, your asking for recommendations is part of your problem - choose for yourself, who intrigues YOU. Likewise, don't be concerned about nationalities - KPOP, Korean dramas have nothing to do with selection. An attractive woman is an attractive woman; nationality only pertinent if you're there for language school. There is no "best" nationality; it's all about personal dynamics.

Lastly, to repeat, P4P doesn't teach you anything about REAL LIFE relationships, doesn't prepare you for REAL LIFE. It's just a facade; recognize it as such.

At what age do you stop being a young'en?

[dewayne]

I agree 100% with 11bravo and his first point in particular-- don't make punting the "normal" for how your brain and body understand sex and intimacy. Find some nice girls around your age, get your heart broken, break a couple hearts, maybe settle down with one, maybe not. Then come back to punting later.

[PsyPsy]

Thanks for all the replies everyone, especially 11Bravo.

I was planning on replying with deep and meaningful response, but I'm feeling quite shy tonight. I respect your blunt advice and will try to follow it as best I can.
In summary though, I am visiting these WLs and MLs for the sexual experience, I worry that when I'm in my 30s and have settled down with a long term gf, I won't have an opportunity to visit.

Thanks for all the recommendations, will check one or some of them out and I'll report back here with an AR of my experience.

Apologies for not being able to reply to everyone, my head's swimming with thoughts on how to reply to everyone and it's a mess.

[11Bravo]

In summary though, I am visiting these WLs and MLs for the sexual experience, I worry that when I'm in my 30s and have settled down with a long term gf, I won't have an opportunity to visit.

Apologies for not being able to reply to everyone, my head's swimming with thoughts on how to reply to everyone and it's a mess.
No need to reply to everyone individually. Nice that you posted a general response.

FOMO trips up many. What are you afraid of missing out on? Meaningless sex with strangers. Go for the REAL thing, not a substitute. I'd be concentrating on finding a gf where you can be making love - adds a whole other dimension to the sex. Wait until your mid-life crisis to start straying... And be advised, many don't, content as they are.

[Brad-Pitt]

Advice that won't be taken


My advice to all young'ens: don't start. If you've started, stop. Take the money you save and go have some REAL LIFE experiences, some REAL LIFE relationships. With a real relationship, real emotions, I think all your problems will disappear. And if they don't, it'll be fun working through them with an emotional PARTNER.

P4P is just sex, NOTHING more. BUSINESS. It's an orgasm, nothing more. No emotional investment. As you're dressing, you can think of what groceries you need to buy on your way home. Too often, the inexperienced confuse sex with love. You need a real life foundation to keep you grounded when you're adding additional stories, and that's all P4P is.

Neither real life nor P4P is like porn. Porn, they're paid to be actresses, just like ML/WG's, but porn is pure fantasy. It has no basis in fact. It's for 2D stimulation, not 3D. It skews your expectations. Nothing wrong with it as long as you UNDERSTAND what it is.

Real relationships are work, 2 way streets. You have to be supportive, not financially, but emotionally. You have to take her good and bad, have to be there when you want to and when you don't. P4P is one-way, that's why you're paying. IMO, those who have too little real experience with the former, too much experience with the latter, they bring the P4P attitudes to the real world. Guaranteed to make your real short, few, and far between. On the other hand, bringing a bit of real into P4P gives you a bit of empathy for the provider, enhancing YOUR experience. Simply put, you treat her like an orifice, she'll be an orifice. Treat her like a person, she'll be a person.


Advice that might be taken


As others have said, or will say, stop with the porn. Lower your expectations, enjoy HER experience; it's just sex.

Check out the rosters, here and on Locanto. Get WeChat for rosters. Check out the photos. Yes, I know all about photos, but find someone who you find attractive in some way. NOT perfect, just something that intrigues you (nice rack, cute face, nice shape, nice smile). Rather than SYT's, I'd suggest older, at the lesser shops (heresy I know). But there, you have more of a chance to be seen as an INDIVIDUAL, rather than just another widget on the assembly line to be processed.

Book an hour. Take your time, relax, enjoy. For me, I don't consider the massage time wasted; it's relaxing, and can be quite nice. Or brothel path, enjoy the foreplay. My experience, older equates to more experience, better chance of a PSE experience if that's your thing, or even GFE. She appreciates the business and will work WITH you. See her more than once, so you feel comfortable with her. Be honest; they've heard IT ALL. Have realistic expectations; don't expect miracles, fireworks, angels singing. Like riding a bicycle. You fall a lot at first, but then, just pedal along and enjoy the ride, the scenery. Enjoy the trip; you'll come (pun intended) to the destination.


WADR, your asking for recommendations is part of your problem - choose for yourself, who intrigues YOU. Likewise, don't be concerned about nationalities - KPOP, Korean dramas have nothing to do with selection. An attractive woman is an attractive woman; nationality only pertinent if you're there for language school. There is no "best" nationality; it's all about personal dynamics.

Lastly, to repeat, P4P doesn't teach you anything about REAL LIFE relationships, doesn't prepare you for REAL LIFE. It's just a facade; recognize it as such.

Thanks for the advice Grandpa

I'm also in my 20's. I always thought it was genuine. Alot of these girls are in their 20's too. And some confess that they developed feelings. Are attracted genuinely.

Now if a punter was a 60+ year old man. Then its probably not real. As there is nothing a 60 year old and a 20 year old will have in common. And i doubt she will be physically attracted to an older, overweight balding man (OBFF as we say in this forum). And will be purely transactional and for money.

But I would imagine, it would be more genuine if the girl and punter are similar age such as myself. As genuine mutual feelings and attractions can actually develop if closer in age brackets

[Precision]

Coming out of the woodwork to join in on this thread.

I also recently starting punting after breaking-up with a long-term girlfriend. I'm in my early 20s and I've only gone on one punt via a private agency so I can share my experience re: that. Prefacing that prior to this experience, I was a virgin but had done oral before. However, I was not particularly nervous for my first time. I'm not particularly interested in going on a rant so I'll keep it short and sweet - some learning experiences/things I've reflected upon:

1. Please don't jerk off the day before. This girl was advertised as PSE so I figured I would cum early and that it would be fine to do it the night before since you 'recharge' quickly. You won't get your money's worth, particularly since I paid $350 for 1 hour. Enjoy the session, abstain for a few days to make the most of your experience. I was not able to cum until the very end of the session (hand job finish) which was a shame as I wanted to CIP or potentially CIM. It could also be an issue of the WL putting too much lube, so there was less friction while inside.

2. YMMV as a young, handsome guy. The WL told me that she felt she was 'shy' because of this. I feel I did not get the 'full experience' due to this factor. I have seen how you can get a lot of 'hidden extras' from other forum posts but I have yet to experience this.

3. Having been my first time, there was that inevitable worry of catching something, especially since I'd copped a BBBJ, DATY and engaged in DFK. Acknowledge that's just the nature of punting.

4. DO NOT GET ATTACHED or FALL IN LOVE. At the end of the day, it is a COMMERCIAL TRANSACTION where you pay for a service to be conferred. The WLs do not want you. I cannot stress this enough, especially if you have never been physically intimate with anyone before. If you're worried about this, I wouldn't even consider punting.

Not sure if this is off topic - I have yet to try some of bordellos like Ginza Club and N5M. Would anyone have any recommendations particularly for which WLs would be worth going out my way for? I've had a look at V Mia at N5M and K Misha at Ginza Club (not even sure if she's still there anymore?), and C Gigi at Ginza Club.

[rooter]

Bloody hell. Gene Hackman did not see the light until he was 95.
Well done for topping yourself Gene. You were a great actor but you ceased to be of any relevance or worth many years ago.
You should have topped yourself 20 years ago.
And taking your wife and dog with you is pretty bad form too.
His missus Betsy Arakawa was a pretty hot granny, She woulda been a hottie when she was younger.
Anyway 65 is a good age to die. After that you are just sucking up precious oxygen, producing carbon and adding to global warming.
And the dog, well he/she was probably 90 in human years.

[ironmonk]

I did get a fleshlight, but my experiences have been a bit mixed. Obviously I’m supposed to be training to get rid of DGS, but in the end i’m either edging for way too long or i’m using the flesh light in a way that mimics my causes of DGS.


I see what you mean bro. Try to wedge the fleshlight in a pillow, sofa or similar, so you're actually using your whole body to pump it. That way the speed and intensity will be lower than with your hand holding the FL.

Seems pretty comical to someone who can't relate, but DGS is no joke. People advocating to get an IRL partner, but without the sexual confidence first (actually being able to cum via penetration and not just go through the motions), you'll just be on the back foot. Young girls have plenty of sexually experienced and functional dudes lining up to fuck them. Punting, fleshlight, etc, it's a means to an end. Whatever you need to get your confidence and XP up, I say go all in.



In particular i do think i plan too much, if i wake up horny it might just be best to book from whoever’s available.


That sounds like a good idea if you have the free time. I'd probably have a shortlist of GFE type WLs beforehand if you're big into DFK.

[rooter]

If you can combine Fleshlight and a VR unit like Occulus or whatever then fucken hell you would never get off your bed/couch - its Incel Heaven welcome to the future/present

[11Bravo]

Seems pretty comical to someone who can't relate, but DGS is no joke. People advocating to get an IRL partner, but without the sexual confidence first (actually being able to cum via penetration and not just go through the motions), you'll just be on the back foot. Young girls have plenty of sexually experienced and functional dudes lining up to fuck them. Punting, fleshlight, etc, it's a means to an end. Whatever you need to get your confidence and XP up, I say go all in.
I don't take it as a joke. But to set the mood, let me ask a question. Do you care if your flashlight prefers silicon or oil based lube? If your ML/WG prefers tea or coffee? Will you bother to ask? Now, with a GF, you should ask AND care. That's the difference with a GF; she's a person, and finding out the answers to those little questions is all part of the fun. (Not even a GF, just dating).

Back in my day, when with a GF, you weren't on a clock as to time left to finish. By definition, it was LT (OK, disregarding if she was still living at home and her parents were out, but I wouldn't recommend dating HS girls). And if OP is still living at home, well, use hers (roommates understand), and, worse case, as the old cliche goes, "get a room". And unlike a flashlight, or a paid transaction, it's someone you have a connection with, which adds a WHOLE other dimension. Likewise, she has a connection to you, she's there because she wants to be, not because it's her JOB. I wouldn't be worrying about "other dudes"; she's there, with you, by choice. You don't have anything to "prove". That's the advantage of GF's, of dating: discovery, including all the foibles. She just might see certain problems as a challenge; most likely, same as you ("Sorry, it takes me a long time to orgasm." "No problem, some more DATY...?" (Just ask her what style SHE prefers... no practice necessary)).

Bottom line: it's 2 people, 1 on 1, together to have some fun, getting to know each other. Clock is NOT running... THAT'S how you build real confidence.

[legitl]

I'm going to be straight up here, if you're in your 20s get off this forum. I kinda regret discovering this place because it has enabled me to go more. Like I won't go but then will lurk and read here for a bit and start going. Honestly I think until you're in your 40s etc live your life and try to punt as least as possible. Not saying don't do it at all but don't make it a hobby like many people who frequent this forum do.

[GoldfishMan]

Wow, OP sure has an incredibly good memory. I can't even remember the details of a punt I had a couple of months ago let alone one from 2021!

[JesseMcCartney]

I'm going to be straight up here, if you're in your 20s get off this forum. I kinda regret discovering this place because it has enabled me to go more. Like I won't go but then will lurk and read here for a bit and start going. Honestly I think until you're in your 40s etc live your life and try to punt as least as possible. Not saying don't do it at all but don't make it a hobby like many people who frequent this forum do.

Dating for the new gen 20 years olds just suck now. Better off just punting