**From Punting to Chemsex – Why I’m Finally Speaking Up**

[westsydneypunter]

**From Punting to Chemsex – Why I’m Finally Speaking Up**

I’ve been staring at this blank screen for weeks, wondering if I should even post this. Honestly, it’s taken me months just to find the courage to do something about it. Writing this isn’t easy, but staying silent hasn’t done me any favours either.

I’m sharing because I’m tired of carrying this alone. Maybe—just maybe—someone else out there needs to know they’re not the only one tangled in this mess.

To be 100% honest, I’ve hit rock bottom with a chemsex addiction, and I need to be accountable to someone other than myself. If this helps even one person spot the signs before they end up where I am, then the vulnerability is worth it. The worst part? There’s barely any real support out there. Try explaining chemsex addiction to a regular therapist—they look at you like you’re speaking another language. The gay community has resources, but for straight blokes caught in this world? You’re pretty much on your own.

The signs I wish I’d recognised earlier: lying about money spent, making excuses for time away, feeling controlled by urges I couldn’t manage, and the secrecy slowly poisoning other parts of my life. When something that’s meant to be occasional turns compulsive, when you start planning your whole week around sessions, when you’re borrowing money or dipping into savings you can’t afford to touch—those are the red flags I ignored for way too long.

Please be respectful if you reply. I’m not after judgment or lectures—I’m looking for real talk from people who get it, or at least won’t kick someone when they’re already down. I know I fucked up. I’m after understanding, maybe some guidance from others who’ve walked this path.

This isn’t about judging the industry, the workers, or the clients. It’s about recognising when recreational fun crosses into compulsion, when spending gets out of control, and when secrecy starts destroying everything else in your life.

If this resonates, you’re not alone. If you’ve found yourself in similar patterns, there’s no shame in admitting it might be bigger than willpower alone can fix.

———————————————————————

**About me**

I’m in my late 40s, single, in a well-paid job and mortgage-free. Not winning any beauty contests, but I’ve had my share of relationships and been lucky in love too. I’ve had some wonderful long-term ones, but when I’m with someone, I never punt—out of respect. It just wouldn’t feel right.

Just under twenty years ago, I took a leap and moved to Australia for work. Hands down the best decision I ever made. Before that, I was based in Europe with a job that had me travelling everywhere—Europe, South America, Asia, the Middle East, you name it. Meeting different people and soaking up different cultures really opened my eyes.

I’ve always had this “fuck it—try it once, and if you like it, do it again; if not, at least you tried” attitude. Probably comes from my upbringing and the era I grew up in. For anyone from the UK: born in the 70s, grew up in the 80s, raved in the 90s—“Castle Morton” or the “Summer of Love.” Yeah, I was one of those kids.

Maybe that’s why I’m still young at heart and don’t act my age.

———————————————————————

**My first punt**

Back in the late 90s, I went to Poland to visit family. One night I ended up in a local bar, got chatting to a local guy, and he mentioned a new brothel just outside town.
Eastern Europe in the late 90s was a different world. Brothels popped up in the strangest places—way out of town, down muddy tracks, hidden in forest clearings. Open 24/7, usually with a flickering sign promising “zimne piwo, gorące kobiety” (cold beer, hot women). For truck drivers, they were a one-stop shop: hot meal, some company, a place to crash.

Remember, this was less than five years after the end of Soviet presence in Poland. Under communism, Marxism saw sex work as a product of capitalism—so everything stayed underground, run by mafia gangs, ex-Soviet army generals, or “businessmen” with local government connections.

Back then, info spread by word of mouth or coded ads in the back of newspapers. It felt mysterious and exciting—not like today, where everything’s on your phone.

Looking back, that night was a big moment. It introduced me to feelings of adventure and desire I hadn’t really understood before.

———————————————————————

**Back home**

First punt done. Back in the UK, I started going every couple of months—technically illegal, but curiosity won out. Being new to it and only hearing horror stories, I never really got hooked. Maybe it was the places or the girls—it just didn’t click.

So I explored other things: swinging (private settings at first), swinger parties and clubs, dogging, a few other kinks. I dipped my toes in slowly.

Then I landed a job that meant regular travel. That’s when things started to shift.

With the travel and the new interests, I got to explore a lot of the world’s nightlife. Days were work—meetings, site visits, the usual. But evenings? That’s when it got interesting. Instead of sitting alone in a hotel room staring at the TV, I started checking out the parts of cities most people don’t talk about. Red-light districts in Amsterdam, Hamburg, Antwerp. Kabukichō in Tokyo. Streets in Tijuana, Pattaya, Barranquilla, Bogotá, Rio—each with its own wild energy after dark. Swingers clubs in Paris and Berlin. Classy hotel bars in Moscow and Dubai where the drinks are pricey, the women look like models, and the line between flirting and business gets blurry.

Every city has a hidden side—you just have to go looking. And I was looking.

———————————————————————

**Australia**

Fast forward to the late 2000s. I had my own place, a great relationship, life felt settled. Then a job opened up in Australia. I thought: what’s the worst that can happen? They say no, or they say yes and I take the leap—either I love it and stay, or I come home with stories. You don’t know unless you try. So I applied, got it, sorted the visa, packed my life into boxes, said emotional goodbyes (including ending a relationship that meant a lot). Hardest part, but we both knew it was too good an opportunity.

Landed in Sydney, settled in, figured out the lay of the land. Maybe a year or two in, I learned brothels are legal in NSW. Thought: sod it, let’s give it a go.

My first punt here was out west—some of you old-timers might remember the place. Incredible lineup: the GILF who knew exactly what she was doing, the redheaded BBW who could edge you to insanity, the tall, thin hot blonde Aussie MILF who gave me one of the best experiences I’ve ever had in Sydney.

First one done, and I was hooked on finding more. Started going every 3–4 months, first local, then branching out—but always knowing the bar was set high at that first shop.

I’m a bit of a service perfectionist. If I’m paying, I don’t want starfish or to need Google Translate for a booking.

We all want different things from a punt, but for me, great service is always top. I’d rather go somewhere I know I’ll have a genuinely good time than risk it on the unknown. That probably kept me loyal to the same place.

Months flew by, visits dropped to maybe once every 4–5 months. Back then, you could get genuinely great service for $120–$150 max. Life was good, prices fair, you knew what you were getting.

It stayed under control. Never became a problem.

———————————————————————

**When it all goes wrong**

My real struggle started in June 2024, when I met one specific working lady (WL) who introduced me to Chemsex. Without realising, things spiralled fast. By the end of 2024, I was doing 4–8 hour sessions, three or four times a week at $200 per hour.

In 2025, the shock of how much money I was sinking into it made me start tracking everything. Awareness helped confront it—at first.

Early 2025, it got worse. I realised I couldn’t fight it alone. In April, I decided to seek help. It wasn’t easy; finding the right support took months longer than I hoped. After five long months, I found an outreach program that accepted me and promised I wouldn’t have to do this alone.

In late November 2025, they helped get me admitted to the Gorman Detox Unit at St Vincent’s for my ICE addiction. A huge step. Now I’m in ongoing recovery, working hard to overcome the sex addiction side too.

The past year has been brutal. I’d be lying if I said it was easy. I’ve had several relapses since November—each one brings disappointment, but also more determination. Setbacks are part of it; I keep pushing forward.

In 2025 alone, this cost me 242 sessions (approx. 488 hours, $87,912 total). The financial hit is massive, but so is the damage to my mental health and relationships. I’m still coming to terms with it all.

Every day is a challenge, but I’m committed to healing. I’m slowly rebuilding, fixing the choices that led here. Through therapy and support, I’m starting to understand the why behind my behaviours and building tools for a healthier future.

If you or someone you know is in a similar spot: seeking help is strength, not weakness. You don’t have to face it alone. There is hope and support out there.

And all of this… because of one person.

If this hits home, reach out. You’re not alone.

[Wayne]

Would help if you said what chemsex is

[Kiki kong]

I hope your road to recovery becomes less challenging.

Ignore the ones on here trying to shoot you down.

All the best mate.

[westsydneypunter]

https://youtu.be/kdbS22vBYzA?si=GBcangFGNY3GYd-f

[westsydneypunter]

I hope your road to recovery becomes less challenging.

Ignore the ones on here trying to shoot you down.

All the best mate.

Thanks mate for your kind words of support

[westsydneypunter]

Would help if you said what chemsex is

https://youtu.be/kdbS22vBYzA?si=GBcangFGNY3GYd-f

[rubit moore]

Would help if you said what chemsex is

Would probably help if you read what he took the time to write, its pretty clear.

OP - fascinating read and thank you for sharing. Good luck mate.

[Wayne]

Would probably help if you read what he took the time to write, its pretty clear.

OP - fascinating read and thank you for sharing. Good luck mate.

I did read it. And it is obviously heartfelt and written from a desperate state. But I can’t relate to it because I don’t have that experience. He is asking for help. I can’t offer any if I don’t know what it is he is talking about. I have now just watching the YouTube video posted. Chemsex sounds like the worst possible type of addiction, marrying physical pleasure with sexual desire. He needs to seek professional help.

[Elbortomorton]

i googled the definition for all

CHEMSEX
sexual activity engaged in while under the influence of stimulant drugs such as methamphetamine or mephedrone, typically involving several participants.

[bummer]

Great piece of writing.
Great info,

There is a lot of truths there, but also one which by using the term "chemsex" mis-informs.

ANY DRUGS ARE DANGEROUS.

That includes prescription drugs, which are easily misused.

SEX is also a drug, so mixing drugs is bad, mixing sex with drugs are bad and many times fatal.

There you go, I have reduced the article/story down to just a few lines.

ALL is true.

[westsydneypunter]

Would probably help if you read what he took the time to write, its pretty clear.

OP - fascinating read and thank you for sharing. Good luck mate.

Thanks - just taking it day by day, it’s hard but nothing in life is easy…

[putsputs]

Take care, and I wish you all the best in your progress and recovery.

Just curious, how did your total amount spent end at 2?

[speranza]

I'll be a little alternate. ICE is addictive and dangerous - good luck with your recovery. Don't ever take it again. MDA on the other hand is not addictive, and is safe when micro dosed in powder form, and is an incredible sex enhancer. Note MDA is not ecstasy (MDMA).It is milder, and a much better love drug. A little hard to find, but if you do, and have a single life that enables you to take it occasionally and have sex, all power to you.

[speranza]

dope is pretty good too, (but nowhere near as good as MDA) and THC edibles can be purchased online in Australia via Smirk and Herb

[westsydneypunter]

Take care, and I wish you all the best in your progress and recovery.

Just curious, how did your total amount spent end at 2?

242 sessions - approx: 488 hours - $87,912 total

[putsputs]

242 sessions - approx: 488 hours - $87,912 total

Got it, thanks.

When you are about to have a setback, what concrete steps/thought patterns do you do to hopefully not give in to the temptation?

[anonymouspunter2]

Put the money into a psychologist instead. They'll put you on the path to figure out why you're doing all of this in the first place. Hint: probably unresolved (or unexamined) childhood trauma. And this stuff is all self soothing to deal with it. You need to get aware of all of it and begin addressing the underlying problems.

[dvu420]

All of us have a story to tell and things to learn from. Thanks for sharing.
It’s also up to all us punters to look out for each other, especially if we see the use of illicit substances and drugs.

[westsydneypunter]

Would help if you said what chemsex is

This would be a good example https://youtu.be/9ZDTZtfx2dQ?si=uqGR-6qbRCIZEzXW

[Mark Cassin]

Props to the OP for sharing that. It's a shame really as chemsex is awesome fun but comes at a hefty price in $, health, head and life - would love to hear from someone that has been through and come out the other side. I guess by definition, that person is not likely to be on this forum

[justincase]

You have to be strong willed, make the choice to give up and stick to it. Otherwise it’s a downward spiral that’ll ruin you financially, physically and mentally.

Dump all your friends as no doubt they use too, wipe your phone, change your number and don’t give it to anyone.

Put your time and energy into getting fit and stay at the gym. Go to the gym every day and tire yourself out.

Only you can make the choice to save yourself and stick to it, good luck.

[Bman619]

Thank you for sharing brother! I haven't been through this so I don't have much for advice but realisation is always the first step. I hope you can break the addiction, while money is one thing, but health is irreplaceable. Keep on fighting, WestSydneyPunter!

[secret0]

I remember seeing your post in the 'how much have you spent this year' thread and knew with those numbers it was an obvious addiction, but didn't know there were drugs involved. That definitely explains the multiple hours-long sessions. The drugs definitely would have fucked up your brain, and you'd need a bigger hit each time.

Glad to hear you recognised the problem AND got help for it.
Good luck with the continued healing, mate. Hope there aren't too many more relapses/setbacks for you in future, but definitely sounds like you have the strength to completely get through this to the end.

[BiggieSmalls]

I remember seeing your post in the 'how much have you spent this year' thread and knew with those numbers it was an obvious addiction, but didn't know there were drugs involved. That definitely explains the multiple hours-long sessions. The drugs definitely would have fucked up your brain, and you'd need a bigger hit each time.


Yes, I remember that thread and was shocked by the session lengths and money spent. Makes sense now.

Is removing your self from Sydney an option? You say you’re fussy about service. I’m sure there are some country towns with no good service ML or WL available. You could rent out your Sydney place and rent in a town in the middle of nowhere. Problem is ice is a big problem in regional towns so probably depends if the ice or the sex is the bigger addiction.

Good luck.

[ColesBag]

Good post, no judgements on this forum. By posting it you've recognised that you feel you have a problem that is very detrimental to your life and your doing your best to comes to terms with it and to fix it. Good luck on your mental and spiritual journey to the light at the end of the dark tunnel. Post updates if you like.

[scotindeeppuss]

Major steps in solving any problem, no matter how big or small, starts with acknowledging and accepting it, which you have already achieved.
Next step would be to face the long journey on rough road, without shoes with bright hot sun in day and cold wind at night, this you might be going through. Leaving the comforts, joy , pleasure that devils offer is never easy.

Great willpower and braveness is required..You are doing great just keep it up..

[MrPB]

Thank you for sharing your vulnerabilities. It's not easy, especially in a forum where true personalities are shielded behind a screen.

Hearing your story was insightful, and hearing your journey was inspiring. The mind can be a curious thing, and you have certainly lead me away from any substance abuse during sex.

Keep going and stay strong, I'll be cheering you on, even if it's only behind a computer screen.

[andrewv]

Some people become addicted to sex, just like addiction to alcohol or gambling. Drugs add fire to the addiction.

I strongly recommend looking up the "12 Steps" program.

The 12 Steps. Note that you don't have to be a religious person to take the steps. Atheists too can benefit. Substitute the word "alcohol" for "sex".

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol — that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God, as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

[HiredGoon]

Put the money into a psychologist instead. Hint: probably unresolved (or unexamined) childhood trauma. And this stuff is all self soothing to deal with it.

Are you a psychologist?

[JazzS]

Thanks for sharing.

[westsydneypunter]

Just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you for your kind words of support. It really touches me to see so many people taking the time to reach out. I’ve noticed a few questions floating around, so I thought I’d give everyone an update on where I stand at the start of 2026.

@Wayne — Regarding your comment that “he needs to seek professional help,” I have, and I’m currently seeing a psychologist to help me dig into the underlying reasons for my addiction. It’s taken me since April 2025, when I first reached out, to find someone who really understands this crippling addiction. I’m only on my 3rd session so far, but it’s already making a difference.

@putsputs — Great question. When I spot a trigger or feel an urge to smoke coming on, I usually try counting the first seven colours I see around me, or I remind myself of the guilt that hits afterward, or think about what else I could have done with that money. They say you need to replace the pleasure with something else, which is way harder than it sounds. But every relapse gives you more “data,” as they put it — you learn what happened, why, and where you were at emotionally. I used to go out on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays; now I’ve swapped those nights for NA and SAA meetings to keep myself busy and accountable.

@anonymouspunter2 — Spot on. That’s exactly what my psychologist and I are working through, and it’s pointing strongly in that direction.

@DVU420 — Like I said, this isn’t about judging the industry, the workers, or the clients. This is just one punter’s story about the darker side of punting.

@andrewv — Thank you so much for the advice on the 12-step program. It was actually one of the first things I came across on this journey, and it’s been a part of my recovery so far — I’ve been attending meetings and even did the “90 meetings in 90 days” push. But honestly, it’s not quite for me. I find the vibe a bit depressing: we all sit around sounding sad. “Hi, my name’s Mark, I’ve been clean for 16 months now,” said in this flat, down tone. Mate, you should be proud! You’ve been sober for 16 months — that’s huge! Share that strength and give others hope. As for the “God” or “higher power” part, I can honestly say I’ve found that power in Buddhism. It teaches that we suffer because we cling to things that are impermanent — and letting go of that clinging is the key to easing the pain.

Thanks again to everyone who’s been there with encouragement. Your words mean more than you know. I’m taking it one day at a time, and I’m grateful to have this community along for the ride.

[Pollux69]

thanks for sharing, and best of luck to OP


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Rlks1]

It’s not about sitting in a room sharing story’s and sounding depressed, it’s about sitting in a room with people that have walked the same path as you trying to become better people

I still attend GA, after an unhealthy relationship with booze, cocaine and gambling, so it’s very similar. I’ve never felt so comfortable in a room full of people I’d never met

You realise that it’s not just you struggling, a lot of people are so it’s great to support each other

[zhief]

Thanks for sharing. First time I've heard about chemsex. All the best in your journey to recovery, one day at a time.

[strongboi]

this thread has been a real eye opener, I best to keep my demons in check

[RodgHerMoore]

If you had said this in your other thread we wouldn't have bagged you out. Now it all makes sense. Good on you for finding the strength to speak up. Sorry i don't know of any other stores but wish you the best in your recovery.

I've read the odd forum story on getting high during a punt so hopefully one of those characters are still around, reads this and can reach out to you and share. Sharing definitely helps with healing having been through the process myself on something else

[RogerWood]

Well done for been so honest and hopefully others can avoid the same problem.

I've done a few similar sessions myself but have decided I cant continue doing so as its hard to afford a regular session,let alone a longer one.

I do find on the longer sessions its possible to bond with the ladies on next level. I find that experience becomes addictive to me and keeps me coming back. At the end of the day the ladies are milking my addiction to them and I find have to constantly remind myself of that. I've really tried to limit my time with them to 60 minutes max and its helped a lot.

Thanks for the heads up, im in my early days of where u have been and will remember your experience as a lesson to me. Hope things are getting better and well done for seeking help (even though it is hard to find).

[Mark Cassin]

"The most powerful prayer in the world, fuck it, the prayer of release and surrender" Jesuit priest Joe Riley
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idRDniBjvKc

[TheOtherI]

242 sessions - approx: 488 hours - $87,912 total

The math ain’t mathing on this one.

What cost $12 or $2, were you short one day and paid with whatever pocket change you had?

Thanks for sharing either way, chemsex is great and all, but a slippery slope if you succumb to addiction easily.

[Mark Cassin]

The math ain’t mathing on this one.

What cost $12 or $2, were you short one day and paid with whatever pocket change you had?

Thanks for sharing either way, chemsex is great and all, but a slippery slope if you succumb to addiction easily.

There is another thread for this with extraordinary level of detail, however here is your answer:

140. 13-08-2025 - 1hr = $352

[TheOtherI]

There is another thread for this with extraordinary level of detail, however here is your answer:

140. 13-08-2025 - 1hr = $352

Thanks for that, just found the post. Damn! This guy fucks!

[HiredGoon]

You have to be strong willed, make the choice to give up and stick to it. Otherwise it’s a downward spiral that’ll ruin you financially, physically and mentally.

Dump all your friends as no doubt they use too, wipe your phone, change your number and don’t give it to anyone.

Put your time and energy into getting fit and stay at the gym. Go to the gym every day and tire yourself out.

Only you can make the choice to save yourself and stick to it, good luck.

Do not dump all your friends, you need people.

[Laserdog]

Thanks for sharing OP. It takes a lot of courage open up about this. Hopefully your story will help others facing similar troubles.

Sex is already addictive enough, enhancing that with stimulants would make an insane combo.

Overcoming this is a long road considering how much you've spent. That many chemsex sessions would've rewired your brain so you'll need willpower, strategies and habits to create new neural pathways to return to some normalcy. You'll need plenty of support too and it sounds like you're right track.

Relapses are setbacks, but the key is to not beat yourself up too much if you do. Chalk it down to another lesson in your journey and get back to healthy habits.

I say this coming from a family with addiction issues. As others have said, finding a more productive activity that'll give you that dopamine hit can be a part of the solution. Could be something like taking up a hobby like photography.

I've found that exercise has helped me a lot with my addictive personality. Could be running, strength training, or even a martial art like kickboxing or BJJ. Hiking and being out in nature is another great option. There are so many great trails within a few hours drive from Sydney.
Try a bunch of things out and see how it feels. Making progress in your physical ability feels awesome.

All the best with your journey to recovery and well-being. Please keep us updated.

[schloong]

OP: as others here have said, thank you for sharing your story.

Sharing helps spread the pain somewhat & best wishes for your recovery process mate, cheers.

[gmno12345]

You can also try some sports as recommended by other posts, I was told tennis and fishing could help with sex addiction… as fishing would give you similar stimulation to happy ending.. or while you play tennis, your body gives out some sort of chemicals.. not sure if it’s true but hopefully it helps…. Wish you all the best !!

[jamesjj]

The other sad part of this story is the girls in the shops that serve this stuff. Often they come to Australia a cleanskin. Easy money at first, with guys doing marathon sessions, but they end up addicted, developing personality disorders and unable to do much outside of working in a shop. OP struggled to find help, you'd think the girls probably would too. This post is probably the tip of an iceberg.

[Double_Adapter]

I once knew a bloke from our local footy team who struggled with a range of addictions. He tried everything from shrinks, alternative therapies, going cold turkey etc but his social circles and lifestyle kept pulling him back in. Then, one day out of the blue the cunt vanished without a word.
Word got around that he’d gone to some rehab health wellness retreat up north to detox. He ended up cutting ties with all his social circles and starting fresh elsewhere.

Straight up question bro - are you doing slamsex or chemsex? And has it led to any STD/STI's?
This might help you get proper referrals and the right assistance and support channels

https://stufenton.com.au/2016/11/Addiction-Treatment-Options-for-Addiction-in-Australia

[GoldfishMan]

fishing could help with sex addiction… as fishing would give you similar stimulation to happy ending..
What if you don't catch anything?

[HiredGoon]

fishing would give you similar stimulation to happy ending..

Jesus, this makes me curious about your fishing technique!

[hiddenasshides]

There's a very young girl I recently met who is quite the polydrug addict, since meeting her, I've been looking into medications that can help reduce alcohol and opiates addiction, Naltrexone.

I also carry naloxone as well, just in case. I'm hoping she finds her way back but she isn't ready yet.

She has hallucinations, intrusive voices, anxiety and paranoia, I suspect the lack of sleep really accelerates her decline. I was in a hotbox overnight with her once and I couldn't sleep for 4 days from the exposure.

[ColesBag]

You know it's funny certain things I did in my yoof had the opposite effect on me, made me not want to. I need a clear head for my debauchery.

Hope you all get through what currently haunts you.

[ColesBag]

FYI there is an excellent rehab facility at Concord Hospital for people that need it. I know a couple of people that have had cause to attend it.

[GoldfishMan]

You know it's funny certain things I did in my yoof had the opposite effect on me, made me not want to. I need a clear head for my debauchery.

Hope you all get through what currently haunts you.

Yoof! Made me chuckle bro... Thank you very much, you really are a treasured member of this forum and I mean it!

[madness123]

What if you don't catch anything?

Thats the true object of fishing...

[Niisato]

@westsydneypunter - good on you for sharing. The first step in addressing a problem is honestly recognising you have one. You're half way home already.

[gmno12345]

What if you don't catch anything?

then I guess you can possibly consider the time you spent waiting to catch a fish as a meditation session .... which may help with head space... win win situation really..
I gotta confess, I dont do fishing myself..

[MikeOxlong1]

How about going on one those long ass cruise trips between continents. It should almost be impossible to score ,allow you mingle with strangers, and possibly meet new friends along the way.

There would be a gym, restaurants and etc to keep you busy.

Addiction is usually the ease of access to the habit/drug. Breaking the access physically (removing yourself from the envirment/social group) is much easier than just relying on your mental state to not relapse.

Regardless of my 2 cents, I know blokes who were hardcore addicts who managed to turn their lives around completely. So you can also win OP, just need to take it day by day.

[curiousgeorge]

Long time lurker, first time poster.

What a sad and terrible story. Like most Im glad you're getting help and I really hope you succeed, you still have a some miles left on the clock and you want to start getting back on track.

And I don't doubt that for some reading this, you may have been a teachable moment and saved them a lot of heartache.

Best of luck buddy.

CG

[strongboi]

Rises in chemsex in melbourne https://www.smh.com.au/national/victoria/surge-in-women-using-date-rape-substance-as-party-drug-leads-to-spike-in-hospitalisations-20260107-p5ns9x.html

[The giver]

Thanks for sharing. I did have one experience that I think could've led to chemsex, older hot thai milf took out a glass pipe mid session and asked if I wanted some, I declined, she smoked it and gave me a BBBJ with the smoke exhaling all over my cock, felt a nice tingling sensation on my cock, but I have no idea what drug it was. Also another time, I was talking to a Russian WL and she told me she toured China and said there were a lot of high earning Chinese businessmen who would be high on Ice and would book 8 hour plus sessions with her. Have also heard of stories of WL getting addicted to coke with customers. I don't have personal experience in chemsex addiction, but I did develop a sex addiction after I discovered punting so I somewhat understand you.

Lost my virginity to a WL at 17 then I joined the military and suddenly I was getting paid good money for a 17 year old and didn't know how to spend the money. Had zero financial sense back then so I slowly got into punting and got hooked for a few years. I was going 2 to 3 times a week every week for a few years, mix of 30-60min sessions each time, it was just too accessible, didn't have to build confidence to talk to regular women, didn't have to worry about rejection or working on game, you just pay and get rewarded. I was also going to massage shops and getting RnT and asking if they did FS to try and get a cheaper deal. Every week I would be going through cracker and newspaper classified ads and websites in my spare time. Calling up and comparing prices, going in trial and error with shops and privates, mix of duds and good punts. Every time I had to travel for work, change posting locations or visit home I would check rosters and classifieds in the area. I don't even know how much I spent in that period of time, probably $10k plus per year conservative estimate.

At one point I did stop completely cold turkey after learning about investing and buying my first property, my focus was on paying down my mortgage rather than women, started punting again few years before and after covid and still do now, but I don't go as often, maybe once or twice a month and always 30min sessions. I have pretty good financial sense now so I focus more on investing my earnings into ETFs, Investment property and super rather than on women.

[JazzS]

2-3 years Dagestan and forget.

Thanks for sharing though op, hope you get through it.

[justincase]

Do not dump all your friends, you need people.

Why the soft approach?

We’re talking about a guy who is being controlled by a powder. A fucking powder!

He has no self control. Think about it, a bit of powder is controlling how his life unravels, he isn’t in control and neither are his friends. If they were they’d be taking nothing, no drugs, no alcohol and no junk food.

Too many people attempt to take the easy way out and never get anywhere.

You dump the current lot as they’re a bad influence and no doubt accepting of his behaviour. Wipe the slate clean.

I don’t see why he has to hang onto anyone who uses. Get rid of them as they’ll only reinforce his bad habits.

It’s a self supportive self perpetuating cycle. Very few make a clean break.

He either walks or succumbs and gets dragged back in.

[GoldfishMan]

You dump the current lot as they’re a bad influence and no doubt accepting of his behaviour. Wipe the slate clean.

I don’t see why he has to hang onto anyone who uses. Get rid of them as they’ll only reinforce his bad habits.

It’s a self supportive self perpetuating cycle. Very few make a clean break.

He either walks or succumbs and gets dragged back in.

Nah bro, that's a stupid way about it. "Current lot" doesn't correlate with "who uses". What do you know about who the OP knows, his circle of friends? Do you know that his friends and loved ones use?

Without this knowledge you are in no position to give advice on who to dump and who to keep. Just stay the fuck away from that shit, as much as we all know you like to spout BS "advice" from your armchair or whatever you sit on.

[GoldfishMan]

PS I reckon the first step OP has to take is stay the fuck away from this forum. His sex addiction is entwined with his substance addiction. He has to realise this.
Now if OP really does stay away, that brings up the question.... Is there any point in continuing this thread?

I for one would hope that OP doesn't come back. Walk into the sunset and heal, brutha. All the best to you. As for the rest of us, you can shit fight all you like. I'm out of this thread.

[justincase]

Nah bro, that's a stupid way about it. "Current lot" doesn't correlate with "who uses". What do you know about who the OP knows, his circle of friends? Do you know that his friends and loved ones use?

Without this knowledge you are in no position to give advice on who to dump and who to keep. Just stay fuck away from that shit.

His circle of friends are users I’d guarantee it. Club scene, rave scene, whatever, it’s everywhere.

If he doesn’t need money I’d suggest going to a place where he cannot be close to anyone that feeds his addiction.

Sign himself in and stay there till he’s clean.

Only he can do that.

Being soft and nice just doesn’t cut it.

[Mark Cassin]

His circle of friends are users I’d guarantee it. Club scene, rave scene, whatever, it’s everywhere.

If he doesn’t need money I’d suggest going to a place where he cannot be close to anyone that feeds his addiction.

Sign himself in and stay there till he’s clean.

Only he can do that.

Being soft and nice just doesn’t cut it.

What if he has no friends?

[Double_Adapter]

What if he has no friends?

With substances like lsd, magic mushrooms, Buddha sticks et al you can have a ton of 'imaginary' friends

[Mark Cassin]

With substances like lsd, magic mushrooms, Buddha sticks et al you can have a ton of 'imaginary' friends

HaHa

Or you can imagine the WLs are your friends

[HiredGoon]

His circle of friends are users I’d guarantee it. Club scene, rave scene, whatever, it’s everywhere.

If he doesn’t need money I’d suggest going to a place where he cannot be close to anyone that feeds his addiction.

Sign himself in and stay there till he’s clean.

Only he can do that.

Being soft and nice just doesn’t cut it.

Soft and nice? Wtf are you talking about? OP probably got introduced to the drugs through a wl, not his friendship group. Becoming more isolated is terrible advice in a situation like this.
Do you actually have friends Vincent?

[Double_Adapter]

Soft and nice? Wtf are you talking about? OP probably got introduced to the drugs through a wl, not his friendship group. Becoming more isolated is terrible advice in a situation like this.
Do you actually have friends Vincent?

Perhaps Vinnie would rather have no friends than fake friends....just saying

[11Bravo]

Some people become addicted to sex, just like addiction to alcohol or gambling. Drugs add fire to the addiction.
I strongly recommend looking up the "12 Steps" program.
AA, GA, NA...


JBut honestly, it’s not quite for me. I find the vibe a bit depressing: we all sit around sounding sad. “Hi, my name’s Mark, I’ve been clean for 16 months now,” said in this flat, down tone. Mate, you should be proud! You’ve been sober for 16 months — that’s huge! Share that strength and give others hope. As for the “God” or “higher power” part, I can honestly say I’ve found that power in Buddhism. It teaches that we suffer because we cling to things that are impermanent — and letting go of that clinging is the key to easing the pain.


ItÂ’s not about sitting in a room sharing storyÂ’s and sounding depressed, itÂ’s about sitting in a room with people that have walked the same path as you trying to become better people

I still attend GA, after an unhealthy relationship with booze, cocaine and gambling, so itÂ’s very similar. IÂ’ve never felt so comfortable in a room full of people IÂ’d never met

You realise that itÂ’s not just you struggling, a lot of people are so itÂ’s great to support each other
Like Rlks1 says, it's your peers, those that KNOW your experience, whatever that experience is. Sure, it might not be the full compound experience, but they know at least half of it. I'd say look for a different meeting, find a sponsor that you can bond with. When you get those urges, someone who you can call, can come see you, get you through the "night".

=====================================


Perhaps Vinnie would rather have no friends than fake friends....just saying

Yea, Justincase assumes the OP had no straight friends before he went off the rails (no disrespect), or that they all abandoned him when he did, or he cut them lose when he did. Obviously you cut off the enablers, but thing about TRUE friends is that they'll always be there for you. An entourage, not so much...

[westsydneypunter]

Soft and nice? Wtf are you talking about? OP probably got introduced to the drugs through a wl, not his friendship group. Becoming more isolated is terrible advice in a situation like this.
Do you actually have friends Vincent?

Spot on - it was introduced by a by WL and not my friends.

[Linza Giz]

Sounds like OPs mental health is all over the shop. I was like him once, but starting a dog walking business has done wonders for my finances and my mental health.

It always gives me a boost when the dogs give glowing feedback...

OP maybe something like my business for yourself can help you direct your passions and energy in a different direction. All the best

[Mark Cassin]

It got Tom too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kz9nku_qp2Q

[Shitsyeah]

Spot on - it was introduced by a by WL and not my friends.

Mate. I sincerely hope you get yourself sorted. Good Luck. All the Best.

Perhaps I should not say this but I gather the place where this all happened is Artarmon 90.
Just wondering which ML was the one that introduced you to the "Shit".


Personally I don't need any type of Drugs or Alcohol to have a "Good Time".

Have tried "Shit" in my younger years but some of the stuff out there nowadays. No Thanks

[NikitaDuesy]

Warm greetings! Hope you're doing well.

Let's make your concept a reality together. I'm offering grants for promising projects and genuine personal needs. WhatsApp +66838202152

[Mark Cassin]

I imagine the OP is taking ‘personal responsibility’ as part of his journey to wellness.

For him to name the shop and the WL would probably set him back.

No matter how you look at it, you were correct with “I should not say this”

[Kiki kong]

.
Have tried "Shit" in my younger years but some of the stuff out there nowadays. No Thanks

Yea back in the day when "the stuffs" were actually properly good stuff. These days everything is made to double the original amount so your just getting low quality product, its also laced with god knows what.

Not too long ago a female friend of mine went to hospital via the ambos because she toked some with of her friends. She casually smokes but this stuff was wayyyy to strong and her heart beat was way too high for several hours that ambos were called to take her to hospital. You just don't know these days what's inside and what is laced with.

Point is.
"Drugs are bad... mmmkay"
Mr. Mackay ~ South Park

[justincase]

Spot on - it was introduced by a by WL and not my friends.

Adam, Eve and the Apple 🍎

Everyone chooses their path.

[ironmonk]

Seems like money isn't an issue, I'd definitely leave Australia as I believe a new environment is low hanging fruit and a catalyst for change.

A good perspective is hitting rock bottom isn't something that happened to you, but maybe for you? And yeah, like GFM says, no value to be gleaned on this forum. Log off forever and be free.

Desire is the root of all suffering.

[jonnocan]

If this hits home, reach out. You’re not alone.[/QUOTE]

Time to go to NA - narcotics anonymous - you dont get better until you ask for help

[HiredGoon]

Adam, Eve and the Apple 🍎

Everyone chooses their path.


His circle of friends are users I’d guarantee it. Club scene, rave scene, whatever, it’s everywhere.



So which one is it Vinnie?

[Rainyex28]

Hi OP,

I'm a former clinical psychologist, now just doing a corporate role.

Brave guy for admitting all this, I salute you.

Continue seeing a drug and alcohol counsellor.

I also would suggest you see a psychotherapist rather than a psychologist in this instance.

It's pretty clear that punting has formed a major part of your self-identity. You need to explore your unconscious mind. Something a psychologist doesnt specialise in.

(Think what they show psychologists do in movies, but really don't. Psychologists at least in Australia specialise cognitive behavioural therapy)

[Minathy8724]

Thank you, OP. It is very brave of you to share your story. It’s great that you acknowledge the issue, are actively seeking support, and are getting help to address this addiction.
As 2 posts alluded to, consider getting away and enrolling in a dedicated addiction and mental health retreat program.
I am not affiliated with the website, but a resource like recovery[.]com can help you find a centre (close to home or abroad) that may suit your needs.
All the best on your recovery journey.

[justincase]

So which one is it Vinnie?

Which what?

Have you noticed I hardly ever post? Keep yourself busy with someone else, I have other things to do.

[holi_day]

Wow what a story! Thanks OP for sharing. I guess every man would have to sink at least once to grow up strong mentally.

This happened to me twice. First time I almost decided to divorce but fortunately, the lady I sank my heart in, pulled the plug and found another man. I felt deeply hurt in heart but after a couple months when I sobered up, I felt fortunate that it had stopped this before any real damage.

The 2nd time was in Sydney. I burnt $30k in 7 months. This was crazy as I always have very strict budget. When I realized that I was having a problem. I start my own therapy by seeing other WLs. Fortunately I met Joey from Euston St in Rydelmere. She had a feeling for me and sort of filled my emotional gap. We developed some sort of personal relationship but not too close. She never asked for any benefits, nor initiate messages but always responded mine. We never met outside the shop and she would decline if I book over two hours session. I soon cut my ties with other WL I had problems with and back to my normal life.

Since then I never fall again.