This is perfect advice man. I agree with you 100% and it's so true. The girls deserve a healthy loving relationship.
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Better not to get too involved with an WL. But if it happens I think you have to be prepared to get burnt. It's not too different to dating a normal girl, things just never work out sometimes. But you have to go into it knowing all the pros and the cons. And most importantly, enjoy the whole process.
Was just about to say that unless $2k is small change for, er, small (the OP), declining to accept the return of the gift just might mean that at some level, he hopes she will see what a nice guy he is and come back to him eventually, or at the very least make her think she should have gone with him instead of the other (married) guy...
In my experience WL's think different, they do not consider having sex with multiple guys as cheating even though they have BF/husband/partner, I have met lots of WL's who are in serious relationship but once in a while pop into brothels to fulfill their fantasies or to get away from their reality as they miss having sex with multiple guys, most of them do it to make some extra money to buy either LV/Gucci/Prada crap and some do it because they like being WL once in a while.
If you are single it is easy to fall in love with WL's or ML's as they give you intimate sensual feeling and you would fantasise being with them once you are back home.
Learn to master on and off switch between your life and punting life or you will always end up breaking you heart.
It seems like the guys who fall in love with Wl's are the perpetual nice guys with zero back bone and useless at setting boundaries.
For the OP maybe you should ask for the $2000 neck lace that I'm assuming you worked hard for and in no way does she deserve just because she put on some lacey nickers and allowed you to pay for her dinners.
A girl who does what she does for a living, leads you on, in a relationship with a married man with a young daughter is not the type of girl any "man would be lucky to have," she is the exact type of girl every man should avoid.
I'm not trying to put you down or belittle you, maybe you should read the book No More Mr Nice Guy by Robert Glover or something.
You weren't dating her . So no loss to you. you got more than you pay for. You got to fuck her in her place then went out for dinners walks . If this was an escort it would cost you thousands. She never lead you on. it's was you who decided to buy her the necklace. Then she did the right thing by telling you that she was actually dating another Guy 6 month already. She didn't like him because he lies. She wanted a family but you're not up for it.
didn't your book tells you that this happens with normal girls as well, especially with the hot pretty girls because they got lots of options. Stick with the girls that nobody wants then I'm sure you can have it all to yourself.
Anything good in life is always hard to get.
I personally haven't read it as I don't need to, but have heard it is a good read and may be helpful assuming he wants help which he probably doesn't.
The book is not really the point of my post anyway, he could read tea leaves for all I care.
Hey @small
Thanks for sharing your story and I too have been a similar position, however I would have been the one leaving the family for the girl. It did not go ahead because once you realise the financial, emotional and social realities of a divorce then you start to question if it is really worth it. Especially when kids are involved! I would daresay this will happen with the other man your girl has chosen. Divorces are not that easy.
Just like us punters, these girls can also have their judgement clouded by this world and she’s become sucked in by the prospect of stability and very likely visa options. Not sure if you’ve ever had those type of discussions with your girl.
I’d say you certainly have dodged a bullet here
Ps I’m glad to hear more stories coming out and I will share mine eventually, just never have for fear of getting flamed, it’s not something that we can easily discuss with family or friends ‘on the outside’ so its great that we can all support each other here.
Yeah man I am hearing you. Currently I am on the border of a relationship or just being friends. I think in the best interest of myself, its best to remain friends. I mean sure there is always that option to get into a relationship but after the past few days of reading and getting to know her, I think its just way better to be friends. There is no connection in terms of love but being friends is awesome ! We actually act like friends when we hangout and doing stupid shit like laugh at each others jokes and give ourselves high 5's when we are talking, all that friendship type of stuff.
Deep down, I don't think I am even prepared to have a girlfriend. I would like to have a girlfriend, but I have come to the realisation of what you said CFM001 and have taken all of your advice on board. I am involved with my regular but not to much if that makes sense.
Totally agree. If she was only with you then let her keep the necklace if she decided to move on. However, she had another guy and you both at the same time and basically, she was weighing up her options as to who would deliver more. When she was not committed to you then such girl should be avoided for any relationships. You should have taken the necklace back when she agreed to return it.
I'm really glad you thought about it and made a decision. It can be really hard to draw the line between friends and a more involved relationship. You should be aware that with time, either you or her may want something more. If that happens, it's either you both become serious or it's bye bye. I think it's really hard to just remain friends if there are feelings involved. Not that it's impossible though....
Thanks man. She has told me numerous times that we have no chance at all of getting into a relationship which is cool however, the other night when we went back to her place to hangout, it did get personal. Not so much about feelings but while she was sleeping and I was laying on the bed, I just got thinking to myself "what do I really want in life". I wasn't falling in love with her despite it feeling like a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship, I was just chilling on the bed while she was sleeping if you know what I mean.
But yeah CFM 001, going back to what you said, I have taken everything on board.
Yeah the reason she said no chance of a relationship because she wants to meet someone outside of the shop which Is totally fine no problems.
I’m a cynic ... I think another before posted on this or, another rote thread of similar vanity .. too paraphrase
....If it’s a love feel you got going why post here?
Btw the OP’s narrative a bit odd , he says he sees her out of work at hone but then states how they have sex in the shop and then go out so he pays twice
Irrespective the prose constructed much better than most
It’s Xmas eve and I’m in a mood for believing in make believe
No She was never with James11 in the first place .Jame11 justed wanted sex outside the shop . The WL was seeing another guy for 6 six months but the Wl didn't trust the other guy. . Since James11 came along she was considering him as an option . But the Other Guy say he'll marry her . This is what she wanted .But james are into marrying her so she decided to give the other guy another go .
I have dated a few Massage Girls now and I take each day as it comes.. The reason a ML normally wants to find someone in the outside world is basically a fresh start.. The new person has no idea that that they had a secret life.