Arranged Marriage and family won't accept we don't children

[WollongongGuy00]

Do you go punting?

Is there a plot twist somewhere?

[Tendulkar]

I wish my dad wasn't such a neglectful asshole, mostly because he is always at his clinic, he is actually a well known and reputable dermatologist, he was a little less neglectful back we were kids and always used to buy us stuff from other countries, but used to be a bigger bastard then too, he was never physical with me, although he did pour a glass of water on me once in anger, when I didn't want to go to school as a kid. He was from a rather uneducated and backwards family with very old fashioned views, so you can see how this impacted his personality, but then again, you can be highly educated and still lack morals.
I never grew up to be a brave person and my mental health only deteriorated with time and age.
I have lost all hope for the future and i'm trying my best to survive and cope with my situation, the only reason I haven't gone insane is because of my dogs and movies and TV shows, my family and wife doesn't really care what I do, it's just that I feel like they don't appreciate me enough.
Also recently developed problems with my eyes, eyestrain and dry eyes and now I have something new to stress about...I wear glasses and have mild astigmatism and my sleep isn't that great, so I tend to wake up in the middle of the night with a rapid heart rate.
Even worse, I still miss my fraternal twin who I blame my parents for putting a wedge between us. This toxic environment caused her to develop severe signs of narcissism, manipulative behaviour and to suffer from delusions and severe OCD and became emotionally abusive to everyone in the house and had also brainwashed me against my other siblings when she believes that my other siblings, were always plotting against her amongst each other, even thinks that mum does everything deliberately to tease her etc, the worst part is the she believes that she has no mental health problems an that everyone else around her is flawed, evil or crazy. I suspect this could be paranoid schizophrenia..
She did certain things in 2023 which led me to grow a grudge against her and I had to ghost her completely to protect my own mental health from getting worse, after this she started cussing me out and said some disgusting and mean things about me.