Hey mate, you should get professional help, not just "professional" help.

I'm older than you and have a very similar history. I had issues even getting hard with real women. What arouses you and makes you cum has been informed by porn, and ingrained with every repetition. Porn does not mimic reality. Expecting a WL to meet the standard of a 2D girl is pointless.

Also, popping your punting cherry is usually an awkward/uncomfortable experience as far as I know.

When you can, send me a PM and I can give you some suggestions.