Female Punter!

[lilac]

There are a lot of questions here and not gunna lie, would have been ideal if bullet pointed.

omg didn’t expect a legitimate answer to this at all, apologies for not making bullet points hahah. but i do have to say, i really appreciate this information, thank you so much.

these are the only parts I’d comment on as a woman:

Female nature is hideously erratic to the average man. Women are born of intense emotion. Everything is 'feel'. I 'feeeeel' like there was nothing in our relationship (meanwhile living in the absolute lap of luxury) I 'feeeeel' like the relationship wasn't working (married to a man worth X amount of billions of dollars whos attractive, hung, and does everything for her). You know what I mean.

i do know what you mean, we are really emotionally driven creatures. but i think we’re often not that hard to understand as men make out. short answer, we’re more concerned with how things are said/done rather than what things are said/done.

i think because men have this idea that woman feel “loved” or satisfied in a relationship when the man is simply ‘high value’ and providing. of course, money and looks are ideal, just like a pretty, fit girl is ideal - but not at the expense if she’s a complete bitch. so it’s kinda similar.

women are more concerned with passion which is that ‘feeling’ - a special ‘spark’ or deep connection. we’re also highly driven by feeling special, desired, beautiful (similar to guys feeling strong, capable, powerful).

feeling like there’s nothing in the relationship meanwhile living a luxurious lifestyle = “my husband gives me a nice lifestyle but he’s always busy/unattentive, he’s always looking at other girls, he never does chivalrous gestures” etc etc, basically translates “my man doesn’t make me feel desired, or emotionally safe or secure, I can’t be my most genuine, peaceful, feminine-self, because I’m constantly having to be in my masculine energy in order to deal with my emotions/problems on my own and keep a level of guard up in case this man practices infidelity.”

We loved you how you were when we first met you. You marry us liking what we were, but wanting us to change into what you think is better.

noooo this is so bullshit though. men always want their partner to be better too. there’s always never ending expectations of nicer dinners, cleaner house, more devotion etc. men are attracted to younger, more passive women, majorly because they are more mouldable to what they believe is ideal. sometimes it’s even a physical thing; dating a girl where you love her personality but hoping she can improve her looks to fit your ideal.

i laughed reading the next part, I do have to agree there are sooooo many toxic women who just talk and talk the same problem in circles and call it communication and then give the silent treatment too. and even use sex as a punishment. idk but in my experience this is usually good looking entitled girls who want a man they can control, rather than one that can lead them - just stay away from the ‘brain rot’ types lol. i promise you, not all of us are like this.

Uh, they are the ones you rejected, the ones in your friend zone. Those are the 'good' guys who would be with you through thick n thin.

just because a guy is devoted and nice doesn’t make him a good partner or a “good guy”. there are plenty of girls who would be devoted to you but they’re not super hot, or they have a promiscuous past, etc, and men would not even consider her. so I don’t think it’s unfair for women to have realistic expectations/standards when it comes to looks or finances in dating too (note realistic is a key word lol). i have to say, many girls i know stuck with their partners who didn’t have much and now they are very wealthy together. i think men are actually inclined to love a girl for what she gives him (e.g. you love her cause she brings you peace, takes care of you, cooks your meals, etc) where i know many girls who stay with losers or toxic guys (“i can fix him”, “he wants to change”) etc.

Do you want slutty or nice?
- as per Ushers song 'Yeah!'
"We want a lady on the streets but a freak in the bed". End of story.

all men say this but why don’t the “good girls” get more attention. as I mentioned, women’s nature is so focused on being the most beautiful, desired, usually measured by attention. why would we be sweet, innocent and cute when that never gets us approached anymore, and we only get approached in clubs wearing tiny mini dresses etc.

it creates such a huge dilemma for us of how to be and present ourselves because men SAY they prefer good girls but their actions never follow. we understand on a logical level it’s just sexual attention and not ‘wifey’ attention but because we want to be desired so bad it still affects us. men complain so much about girls all being hoes these days, then stop giving them so much attention and start asking out the cute, quieter girls…

Do you still like purity even if you've banged 100s of girls?
- yeah of course. That's a no brainer. The reverse question for a girl would be : do you want a guy who's got no idea what he doing in bed or a guy who has banged 100 women and knows the female body inside out? For us we love the idea of being your first, because virginity means that your reactions and emotions are also pure. Once you've banged 100 blokes you know how to act like you love it etc when you don't. Conversely a guy who has no idea what he is doing is a turn off for girls. But a bloke who knows how to dominate you and take you to an O, is sought after.

hmm yes and no. of course it’s appealing to be with a guy that can satisfy you (especially when men have such a bad reputation of being able to lol). at the same time, me, most girls in my circle, we wouldn’t like men with ridiculously high body counts because 1) we feel like just another body and less special or less connection 2) we compare ourselves and wonder if we are the best and drive ourselves crazy feeling insecure and 3) we wonder if you’re ever going to be able to be happy with just us once your brain is so accustomed to promiscuity.

anywayyy just sharing my take as a woman, thank u again for the insight.