Originally Posted by
GoldfishMan
While I'm firmly in the "do not intervene" camp, I must admit this has come back to bite me on one occassion.
More than 20 years ago, I met a very attractive HK girl at a place I was working at. I got to know that she was engaged to the man of her dreams and she was very happy and looking forward to a beautiful life with him. I was married myself, so I just went along and treated it as a friendship. I figured no harm in having beautiful friends around you. Besides, she also had a Vietnamese friend colleague who was also hot that I got along well with.
Anyway, a short time after this my wife went for her citizenship ceremony and when she came home, she told me that some guy at the ceremony was hitting on her and even gave her his business card. She showed it to me and I almost fell off my seat. It was my HK friend's fiance!
There I was all torn up about dobbing the guy in, so I turned to the Vietnamese girl for advise over drinks one weekend. She told me to not intervene, so I took the advise.
Fast forward a few more years, I went into a spiral of self-destruction that saw me divorce from my wife after cheating with a girl. I was so sick of hiding my true self that I went around telling people how I unflinchingly destroyed my own marriage just to be "free", including telling this HK girl. She didn't say much at the time. She'd married that dream guy and was really happy.
After that, maybe 8 years went by without any contact with the HK girl, then one day I got a message from her out of the blue. She seemed distressed and said she wanted to ask me something.
Over many many chat messages, she told me what happened to her life over the last few years. She told me that she'd found out that her dream guy had always been cheating on her for many years. The last thing he did was he'd left her for another girl right when she was pregnant with their first child and even worse, he'd conned her family out of her family home in Killara. He'd persuaded her dad into remortgaging the house to lend him capital for a business and ran off with the money!
As she told me the story, I couldn't help but wonder... Maybe I should've dobbed in that arsehole all those years ago!