Reply With QuoteHonour amongst puntersOriginally Posted by asiafever
A bit dickish? No, it's far worse than that.
Never get in the middle of a married couple.
Couples stay together in totally loveless relationships for the kids, husband still has sexual needs and so steals some time for himself with a wl. Is he having an extra-marital affair while the wife believes she's in a loving marriage? No. He's taking some time for himself before he goes home to yet another shitfight. Just one scenario, but one from real life.
Point is, you never know what's going on in the background, so best to stay out of it and keep it to yourself. Maybe the wife knows and is fine with it, maybe he is just a dog who can't help himself, none of it concerns you.
That's why the people I call friends wouldn't utter a word, we have a mutual respect, sure we rip shit out of each other but what is said between us stays between us. Not so much honour amongst thieves, but just basic decency.
Honour amongst punters
You are First Among Equals in punting game.
Absolutely agree here. I’ve seen a women being absolutely bashed by her boyfriend then jump on the back of the bloke who stepped in to stop it and start clawing at him
And again I agree here in general. But if the wife directly asked me I’m not going to lie to her (mostly because I’m absolutely shit at it). More likely I’ll walk off before someone can ask me about something like that.
I guess we hold each other to different standards here. While I wouldn’t go running my mouth off I’d also never expect anyone to lie for me. I’m not comfortable putting anyone in the position to feel like they have to lie for me
@Asiafever - I've asked generative AI for an answer on the the dog act question, and for what's it's worth here it is:
Consideration of the Friend's Well-being:
First and foremost, I would consider the potential impact of my actions on my friend's well-being. If their safety or mental health were at risk, I might choose to disclose the information to ensure their best interests are protected. However, it is essential to carefully assess the situation before making any decisions, weighing the potential benefits against the potential harm caused by betrayal.
Communication and Consent:
I believe open communication and respect for personal boundaries are fundamental in any relationship. If I felt compelled to share sensitive information about a friend, I would make an effort to discuss it with them first, seeking their consent to disclose the information. Honest and respectful dialogue can often lead to a better understanding of the situation and help establish a mutually agreed-upon course of action.
Honesty and Integrity:
While honesty is important, it is crucial to evaluate the potential consequences of revealing certain information. Sometimes, withholding information may be the most compassionate course of action, especially if it is unlikely to cause significant harm and disclosure might only serve to create unnecessary tension or damage relationships.
Empathy and Support:
Regardless of the actions taken, it is important to approach the situation with empathy and provide support to the friend involved. Recognizing the complexities and emotions tied to such situations, offering a non-judgmental ear and support can help maintain a sense of friendship and trust despite any initial disagreements.
@Asiafever - It really does all come down to circumstances. Would you react differently if it was your brother in law you ran into and your sister is the one at home being cheated on?
Not my position to come between them. I would talk to him, find out what's going on etc, but what you risk is that you sister believes you're trying to sabotage her relationship and so on. No good comes from it. Other people's business is other people's business. I say this knowing full well my BIL has had Escorts previously and my sister had a relationship on the side for a short while. They're adults, it's their business not mine. Neither has ever asked me, and to be honest I'm pretty sure both know anyway.
On the subject of lying for someone, nobody has asked anyone to lie for them, the chances of a wife confronting someone and asking "does my husband visit prostitutes" is close to zero, especially if my earlier point is observed. If she is even close to asking that, she knows in her heart anyway and wouldn't bother.
That was kind of the point I was aiming at and I’m glad you answered the way you did. It’s what I hope I would do in that situation. I tend to veer towards the absolute honesty in relationships and am pretty open about being open.
I think the second part would be even worse and no matter what you answer they will already have made up their mind. Never underestimate the power of self delusion in relationships
Very true, when dealing with the delusional you are best staying right out of it.
While I'm firmly in the "do not intervene" camp, I must admit this has come back to bite me on one occassion.
More than 20 years ago, I met a very attractive HK girl at a place I was working at. I got to know that she was engaged to the man of her dreams and she was very happy and looking forward to a beautiful life with him. I was married myself, so I just went along and treated it as a friendship. I figured no harm in having beautiful friends around you. Besides, she also had a Vietnamese friend colleague who was also hot that I got along well with.
Anyway, a short time after this my wife went for her citizenship ceremony and when she came home, she told me that some guy at the ceremony was hitting on her and even gave her his business card. She showed it to me and I almost fell off my seat. It was my HK friend's fiance!
There I was all torn up about dobbing the guy in, so I turned to the Vietnamese girl for advise over drinks one weekend. She told me to not intervene, so I took the advise.
Fast forward a few more years, I went into a spiral of self-destruction that saw me divorce from my wife after cheating with a girl. I was so sick of hiding my true self that I went around telling people how I unflinchingly destroyed my own marriage just to be "free", including telling this HK girl. She didn't say much at the time. She'd married that dream guy and was really happy.
After that, maybe 8 years went by without any contact with the HK girl, then one day I got a message from her out of the blue. She seemed distressed and said she wanted to ask me something.
Over many many chat messages, she told me what happened to her life over the last few years. She told me that she'd found out that her dream guy had always been cheating on her for many years. The last thing he did was he'd left her for another girl right when she was pregnant with their first child and even worse, he'd conned her family out of her family home in Killara. He'd persuaded her dad into remortgaging the house to lend him capital for a business and ran off with the money!
As she told me the story, I couldn't help but wonder... Maybe I should've dobbed in that arsehole all those years ago!
That's deep
Personally, I would of called the number on the business card and had a couple of words with him. Nothing threatening. But just letting him know you have something over him and that's probably as far as I would go. If he had another punt at ya Mrs then free game. Either have a tilt at his, or just let her know what's happened... Something that I have learnt over time - never get involved in someone else's relationship
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Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
Time to turn over
Never thought of doing that. Might have worked or maybe not. Back then, this girl was so over the moon with the bloke that she just about accepted everything he told her as gospel. He had her under his spell.
She would tell her Vietnamese friend and I about how he would go out on Friday nights with his "platonic" girl friends and she would be banned from going with him on those nights. We asked her what he does those nights and she confidently told us "playing mahjong and maybe karaoke". V girl and I were left speechless, couldn't say a thing to point out red flags. It's incredible how someone's mind can be manipulated so much by another person, now that I think back about it.
I also left out an important point about the story. You see, the reason she'd contacted me and told me this story was because I had apparently left a mark on her when I told her all about how I destroyed my own marriage.
When she finished her story to me, she said to me "The only person I know who had done something as bad as what he did to me is you. Can you explain to me how someone could be this evil?".
I'll have to point out that I am nowhere near as evil as this monumental dickhead. I went far above and beyond what I had to do to make sure my ex-wife had a good life after I left. To the point of leaving myself in deep trouble while doing that. Proof of this is even to this day, my ex-wife confides in me for advise on major life decisions.
Anyway, you can imagine what a terrible situation HK girl had put me in. On one hand she's clearly stating how lowly she thinks of me. On the other hand, I actually knew that the guy was an arsehole from the beginning and didn't do anything about it! Wtf....
its a weird game we play hey
i dont know whats a better way to explain it - life on the edge, or double life?
what makes it funny is that we talk openly about it on the internet under alias's, but never with (or only a few) close friends
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Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
Time to turn over
A smile and nod is all that's required.
Thanks for sharing this story Gold. People are not what they seem. I doubt HK girl would have believed anything that you said when you first found out. Maybe V girlfriend and you could have subtly hinted but she was probably too smitten. I’ve met many manipulative people in my time. They spin really convoluted outrageous stories which people get sucked into. They eventually (usually) unravel whilst leaving a trail of destruction in their wake.
Trail of destruction indeed, bro. I really couldn't believe how badly it all turned out for her. I thought the worst that could happen was she got a divorce or something, but the story got worse and worse as she told it.
I never had any contact with her since then, but she's etched forever in my mind now because of this incredible guilt I had to go through when it all happened within the span of 30 minutes or so when she told me her story.
I was walking down the hallway of a massage joint and the door to my right suddenly opened, then out walked the fattest bastard I've ever seen buck naked. Our eyes met and he was like a deer in the headlights. It took every ounce of self control not to do the up down look on him and keep walking.
The 2 recent threads on cops reminded me of an incident many years ago at the original D'Privilege. I had a great midday session on the top floor. Really pretty and sexy ML. After i was done i walked down stairs.
There was some commotion in vietnamese. My ML was ahead of me and walked back upstairs and grabs my hand. I see a copper from the local command that was 1 block away walking up!!! In full uniform!! He was still wearing his hat so he didnt see me.
ML lead me into 2nd floor and closed the door. The way she held my hand was like GFE fingers entwined. She left the room.
Enters back 2 mins later and gives me the all clear to leave.
No way was i going to swap notes with the local constabulary!! LOL!!!
Goes to show they know what's going on...arguably it's a local council issue giving part 2? :P. What do state cops care about local bylaws LOL!!
They're human and have needs too
Maybe some are active forum members! Lol
Yep, last week once again I sat opposite two other punters in the waiting room. But everyone kept on their phones and didn’t give a toss about one another. Which is how I prefer it.
WL came in and into to all 3 of us at same time. Aussie guy went with her.
Indian guy walked out without making selection after next girl came..
And I was left all alone to po see my decisions. In hindsight I would have bailed also but ended up with an average fuck for the night.
Was it better than jerking off? - of course.
Was it worth the money? - absolutely not.
Never understood the shame when punters walk into a shop, I guess they're concerned of being recognised? Then again I'm single, don't have to worry about being seen nor care if anyone see me walk into a shop. However my advice would be punt far away from where you live...
Anyway If I see another punter in a waiting room and he speaks to me first I'm cool with that. However I won't make the first interaction since I understand he want to be left alone.
There was a time the shop was so busy, the punter and I were in a small room in silence. Then a girl came out from her room and offered us a BBBJ and go.
I declined while the other punter agreed so I left the waiting room and moved to corridor where theres traffic of girls coming and going into rooms. Long story short another punter walks has finished his session and going out he goes passed the waiting room and see the guy getting bbbj. He yells out "wtf!", The girl that was leading him out also saw them and yelled out "wtf!"
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