I’m going through exactly the same thing.
It’s like we are reliving a “first love infatuation”.
I’m older and should be far wiser but still I get emotionally attached. I call it a fools folly. Doesn’t matter how many girls I bang there is only one love and she doesn’t want to know the real me.
Except when we share a booking. Then it’s business as usual and I get to live my fantasy for that hour or two.
Either they’re master manipulators or we are fools in love chasing a butterfly that flits between flowers.
Sooner or they later they must realise that they cannot live this lifestyle forever.
But when?
Do you want to wait that long?